Houses & Motions

houses in motion

2007-04-06T10:29:00.001+08:00

Despite the last post's claim that "we're back", we've been a bit quiet recently. Of course, the state governmental happenings haven't been; the likes of Brian Burke have done their part to make this quite an interesting time. However, we do now have 'exciting' news...

We've moved House(s) to wordpress, hosted over at hansardblog.wordpress.com. All your favourite posts available at this domain have been migrated across, so you'll still get a slice of Budget Pie, five million exchanges involving daylight savings, and that disturbing thing about the mud cake... At the moment everything is organised only by speaker - considering the unwieldy mess that is the categories to the right of this post, we're still deliberating whether further categorisation is a good thing or not...

So, we're still active, just not here. Any questions, queries or comments, send us an email, and we'll hopefully see you in the other place for more of the odd goings-on in the state that we are in...

and we're back

2007-03-06T19:10:00.000+09:00

MR G. WOODHAMS (Greenough) [3.07 pm]: I will not spend a long time on my feet. The member for Vasse reminds me of the Muppets and Sesame Street. Today could well and truly be sponsored by the letter D - it is a disgraceful day, a doubtful day, a detritus day and a disappointing day. The disappointment I have is with members opposite. Most of us on this side of the house have at one time or another had conversations with members on the other side of the house on a range of issues. There are members on this side of the house who would consider those on the other side of the house amongst their friends and associates, with whom they can discuss a range of issues. I presume that most of us have respect for most members of this house. However, it disappoints me that those on the other side of the house do not have the respect of their own colleagues, and they certainly do not have the respect of this side of the house today because they are not defending - another letter D - their Premier in this case, and his cause of rooting out the influence of Burke and Grill in this house. [...] I invite members opposite to explain why they are not supporting their Premier and defending the case of rooting out Burke and Grill from influence in the ALP. This is a very doubtful day.

Ms A.J.G. MacTiernan: We all support it.

Mr G. WOODHAMS: I invite the Minister for Planning and Infrastructure to rise to her feet and build a case.

Ms A.J.G. MacTiernan: I can do that sitting down.

The ACTING SPEAKER: Order, minister!

Several members interjected.

The ACTING SPEAKER: Order! The member for Greenough has the floor. There is no call for conversations across the chamber. I would like to hear what the member for Greenough has to say, and I would like to hear it in relative silence.

Mr G. WOODHAMS: Perhaps I caused that disruption to proceedings by inviting interjections. If I did so, I apologise, Mr Acting Speaker.

I come from a farming background, for which I make no apology. This government reminds me of an old ewe that has secondary fly strike and is riddled with maggots, and even though it has the ability to cure itself, it is taking absolutely no opportunity to do that. Mr Acting Speaker (Mr A.P. O’Gorman), I have read your comment in the paper that you would prefer that the circumstances with regard to Hon Shelley Archer were resolved by having her removed from the Australian Labor Party. Some other members opposite would do well to have the same amount of courage.

Mr R.F. Johnson: The member for Kimberley might want to say something about Hon Shelley Archer, because, as the member knows, she wants the member for Kimberley’s seat!

Mrs C.A. Martin: That is really nasty! I like my seat!

Mr G. WOODHAMS: It is wonderful to chart the progress of the good ship ALP as it staggers from rock to rock and begins to sink. It would seem, though, that the crew of the good ship ALP are about to jump off the ship and leave the rat on board! Hon Shelley Archer is currently still in a position to take her seat in the upper house when it resumes. I advised the Premier earlier that he might like to use Ratsac on that honourable member. If the Premier does not want to take that advice, perhaps he will send the honourable member to “Burketown” in the “Gulf of Carpenteria” -

Several members interjected.

Mr G. WOODHAMS: I am glad members finally got it - Carpenteria!

Subject: Premier - Censure for Failure to Condemn Hon Shelley Archer [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 1 March 2007

Hansard reference: pp. 234c - 241a [online (pdf)]

Previously, in the Legislative Assembly...

2007-03-01T07:35:00.000+09:00

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: [...] Some of the people who are opposed to daylight saving have been quite vicious in their e-mails. Some people have threatened that I will have my legs broken. Some people have made some nasty comments about my parentage.

Mr T.R. Sprigg: You have broken a few legs in your time! You are the “Godfather”, are you not?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I will get to that in a moment!

[...]

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: [...] I do not support everything in this bill. I do not support the referendum. However, I will be supporting the compromise bill that has been introduced by the member for Kalgoorlie and co-sponsored by me, because I believe it will unify the “yes” position and provide the best opportunity to put daylight saving in place at least for three years. At the end of that period, there will be a referendum, and the community -

Mr J.E. McGrath: Why only three years? Why not five years?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I would prefer to have no referendum at all.

Mr J.E. McGrath: If 95 per cent of people support it, why do we need a referendum? Why not just do it?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: Because that is the position that the majority of members in this Parliament seem to support. In the end, this is a democracy, and the majority opinion will prevail.

I also thank the member for Kalgoorlie for giving me his support when I approached him to take a joint position with the government on this matter. His support was fantastic. However, I have a beef with the member for Kalgoorlie. He referred to himself as the father of daylight saving and to me as the godfather of daylight saving. I like to think of both myself and the member for Kalgoorlie as the parents of daylight saving. The only problem is that I am not sure who is the mother and who is the father! We can have that debate on another day.

Mr M.J. Birney: You might have spoken a bit too soon in any case! You should just retract those words for a couple of weeks!

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: Is that right? Is the member suggesting that we should wait until it happens? I actually think the term “godfather” should be given to the member for Hillarys - sorry, the member for Mindarie -

Mr R.F. Johnson: Whaddya say; whaddya say?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: The member has always said he wants to be an Italian!

Mr R.F. Johnson: I am an honorary Italian!

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders -- Suspension]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

Obviously leading to the straw poll that...

2007-02-27T23:55:00.000+09:00

1087. Hon ROBIN CHAPPLE to the minister representing the Minister for the Environment:

I refer to the occurrence of stock from pastoral stations straying into nature reserves and national parks in Western Australia.

[...]

(3) What penalties exist for pastoralists who allow stock to enter a nature reserve?
[...]

Hon TOM STEPHENS replied:

[...]

(3) Under section 106(a) of the Conservation and Land Management Act 1984, the penalty for depasturing cattle on Department of Conservation and Land Management land - including nature reserves - is $4 000 and imprisonment for six months.

Under regulation 15(b) of the Conservation and Land Management Regulations 2002, the penalty for allowing an animal to enter or remain on CALM land - including a nature reserve - is $500, or if dealt with by way of an infringement notice, a modified penalty of $50.

I do not know who would be fined for the herd of about 50 camels I saw in the middle of the Rudall River National Park over the weekend, but I suppose the authorities can work out to whom to send the bill.

Hon Peter Foss: They are probably yours.

Hon John Fischer: Are you claiming ownership.

Hon TOM STEPHENS: I am not.

Hon SIMON O’BRIEN: Are they all enrolled?

Hon Kim Chance: They are now!

Subject: Conservation Estate, Grazing Impacts [Legislative Council - Questions Without Notice]

Date: 13 August 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 9845b - 9845b [online (pdf)]

The crackle of the radio, a message in the evening sky

2007-02-23T21:24:00.000+09:00

710. Mr S.R. HILL to the Minister for Science and Innovation:

Can the minister inform the house of the progress of Australia’s bid to host the square-kilometre array, the biggest radio telescope ever built, and its importance in the mid-west?

Mr F.M. LOGAN replied:

I thank the member for Geraldton for the question. I put on the record my thanks to the member for Geraldton for the role he plays as the chair of the coordinating committee for the Mileura station radio astronomy park and for all the effort he puts into coordinating the number of departments and scientists involved in that project. I thank him very much.

Although all eyes will be on the Australian Football League grand final in Melbourne on Saturday, another one looms on the horizon, but it is a slightly different one. In under six hours we will learn whether the world’s astronomy community has short-listed Australia to host the square-kilometre array, the world’s largest radio telescope. [...] Believe it or not, the world in which we live - I can see it in the wireless network in this place - is bombarded with radio frequencies from wireless networks, radio telephones, radios, televisions, cars and trucks. The whole world is bombarded with various radio frequencies, and to listen in to deep space, and to research the big bang theory and how the universe was created, a radio telescope is required that is not interfered with by radio frequencies.

Mr T. Buswell: Will it pick up the black hole between your ears?

Mr F.M. LOGAN: It is funny that the member for Vasse should say that, because I was just about to say exactly the same thing. I even have it written in my notes. The member beat me to it; well done! We have to get up early to catch him!

On a serious note, for the development of the science industry in Western Australia and for the world to take Western Australia and, more importantly, Australia seriously in the world of science, this project is phenomenal. [...] All the information will be processed by a computer that is so big that it has not even been invented yet! It is enormous.

Several members interjected.

Mr F.M. LOGAN: I have been told - not that I am aware of this level of computing power - that it is about 13 teraflops, which is pretty big - apparently. The possibility is that Geraldton could be the home of this supercomputer. It would put Western Australia on the map, not only in industrial development but also in the science industry, the information and communications technology industry and the computer industry. In particular, it will put Geraldton on the map. As we watch those stars in Melbourne over the weekend, Treasurer - Judd, Cousins and the rest of them - we should remember that we could be looking at other stars in deep space in a few years and we could find out the meaning of life and whether that black hole in the head of the member for Vasse will be resolved.

The SPEAKER: I am not sure whether the word “teraflops” is unparliamentary, but I will check and get back to the minister!

Subject: Square-Kilometre Array - Progress of Bid [Legislative Assembly]

Date: 28 September 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 6931c - 6932a [online (pdf)]

Once upon a tie in the West

2007-02-22T07:50:00.000+09:00

HON JOHN FISCHER (Mining and Pastoral) [5.55 pm]: I will make one or two precursory remarks before I thank some people. Yesterday, the Minister for Racing and Gaming commented by way of interjection on the tie I was wearing.

Hon Nick Griffiths: You have really dished it up to me today!

Hon JOHN FISCHER: The minister certainly deserves to be complimented on the tie he is wearing today. I am sure that anyone from the racing industry would be extremely proud that the minister is wearing a tie that is extremely befitting of the position he holds. While I am talking about neckties, it would be remiss of me not to mention the ties worn by Hon Peter Foss on occasion, and certainly Hon Robin Chapple runs a very close second to him. I mention this today because my nine-year-old daughter presented me with a musical tie that is certainly fitting for this occasion. It brings out the Christmas feeling!

Hon Kim Chance: I think the honourable member’s tie is out of order!

Hon Ken Travers: I told them not to push your button!

Hon JOHN FISCHER: I think I have a flat battery already, but I am sure I will play it again at a later stage.

Subject: Adjournment of the House [Legislative Council - Special]

Date: 19 December 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 4538b - 4544a [online (pdf)]

Email intuition

2007-02-20T07:00:00.000+09:00

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: Leaving aside the 3 000-odd e-mails I have received - I could not find in the e-mail river any from people within my electorate. I have been scanning through them as best I can. By and large, I believe they are not people from my electorate who are involved in this electronic campaign.

Mr M.W. Trenorden: What average of those people would e-mail you and me?

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: I do not mind people doing it.

Mr M.W. Trenorden: It collapses my whole office.

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: I do not mind.

Mr M.W. Trenorden: I’ve got one electorate to look after.

The ACTING SPEAKER: Order, members!

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: It is a historic thing; it is unprecedented campaigning in my experience of this place. In 25 years in Parliament I have never seen us experiencing this type of electronic campaign which -

Mr G. Woodhams: Intimidation.

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: No, no, it is not intimidation.

Mr G. Woodhams: Soft-headed modernism!

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: Welcome to the modern world, member! Expect more of it and in big numbers. If anything, those people who are organising our Internet system will need to devise methods for us to conduct electronic business while simultaneously having the opportunity, off to the side, to receive this type of lobbying. I expect we will get more of it.

Mr M.W. Trenorden: Just dump it. Hit the dump button.

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: That is 3 000 hit buttons to get that dump button. There is another way of doing it and most members have worked out how to do it. One puts it across into a discrete area of one’s e-mail. One can see it there growing and every now and then when one wants to have a look, one can do so.

Mr M.J. Birney: You can also do something crazy like read them! How do you know if they are from your electorate if you do not read them?

Several members interjected.

The ACTING SPEAKER: Order, members!

Mr T.G. STEPHENS: I think I have been digressed!

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders -- Suspension]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

Here's one I prepared earlier

2007-02-18T09:27:00.000+09:00

MR M.J. COWPER (Murray) [10.24 pm]: [...] Some people like to get up early in the morning. They like to exercise in the morning and get going and be on their way. Various members have spoken about their experiences and what they like to do first thing in the morning. I am a morning person. When I was younger, I was a late-night person. As one gets older, the general trend is that one prefers to get up early and go to bed early. I do not know about other members, but I have difficulty staying awake after about 9.30 in the evening, given that I am up at about quarter to five most mornings. The fact is that when the sun comes up, I get up and when the sun goes down, I go home, have my dinner and go to bed.

Mr A.D. McRae: You’re like a chook!

Mr M.J. COWPER: I am exactly like a chook. I am a bit like that member. The only difference between the member and Fat Cat is that Fat Cat has friends.

Mr A.D. McRae: You’ve had that one lined up for a while, haven’t you?

Mr M.J. COWPER: The minister left me no option; I had to lob that one back over the fence.

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders -- Suspension]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

Slightly disturbing

2007-02-17T07:40:00.000+09:00

Hon FRANK HOUGH: This is an attractive business and I am sure the Government has looked at this issue. To build a large corporation and to put up an investment such as this requires guarantees; a return is needed on the investment. These things are very important. I do not believe that we should have a fragmented industry of half a dozen small timber industries feeding off the forest. The member of the Greens (WA) who holds a building licence - I do not think she is any relation of Bob the Builder -

A government member interjected.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: The member does not watch television.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: That is about your level.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: I do not watch The Wiggles.

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT (Hon Jon Ford): Order, members!

Hon Ken Travers: Can we fix it; yes we can!

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT: Order, members! Do not get excited at the end of the night.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: Thank you, Mr Deputy President. We will probably hit ’em high, hit ’em low and hit ’em with the old Pea Beu!

Subject: Wood Processing (Wesbeam) Agreement Bill 2002 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 25 September 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 1543b - 1553a [online (pdf)]

Dessert aisles

2007-02-15T08:41:00.000+09:00

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: [...] I know the supermarkets used milk as a loss leader marketing arrangement, because the milk is always down the bottom end of the store. They are not interested in how much milk they really sell; it is more a case of getting people to walk down those aisles. Suckers like me see something new on the shelf and decide to try it, so I am sent to purchase half a dozen items and I come back with 12.

Hon Barbara Scott: Spending the housekeeping?

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: That is what my wife keeps saying to me. She says that I spend her money quickly.

Hon Kim Chance: It is a bloke thing. They should never send us shopping.

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: That is quite true.

Subject: Marketings of Eggs Amendment Bill 2004 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 19 August 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 5231b - 5249a [online (pdf)]

An independent?

2007-02-14T07:55:00.000+09:00

MR B.S. WYATT (Victoria Park) [4.35 pm]: I do not propose to speak for a great length of time. I will make a few points simply because of the public feedback that I, like all members of Parliament, have received. What surprised me initially about the Daylight Saving (No. 2) Bill 2006 is the response that I have received from members of my electorate and from people all over the state. It is quite clear from the many e-mails that we have all received that this bill has a personal impact on everybody. Every time I have spoken to somebody, I have been given different views. I note that the member for Mindarie referred to different family members who have different views. I have been quite heavily pressured by my mother to vote against this bill.

Mr G. Woodhams: Your mother cares for you.

Mr B.S. WYATT: She does care for me.

Mr D.F. Barron-Sullivan: I hope she lives in the electorate.

Mr B.S. WYATT: She does live in the electorate and, like 2 000 other people who live in the electorate, will not be voting for me again if I support this bill. However, I do not think she voted for me the first time. That is perhaps not a loss. However, I will be voting in support of this bill.

Ms K. Hodson-Thomas: Shall we send her a copy of your speech?

Mr B.S. WYATT: She will be reading it. This bill does have some significance for the people of Victoria Park. The last three referendums on daylight saving have been relatively close.

Dr K.D. Hames: What does your dad think?

Mr B.S. WYATT: He supports me whatever I do.

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders -- Suspension]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

Hoard of state

2007-02-07T08:15:00.000+09:00

Dr S.C. THOMAS: [...] The numbers do not add up. I believe this is something that we on this side of the house will find with this government time and again. If we look closely enough, the budget figures just do not add up. There is no doubt that this will be the blow-out era for budget expenditure. There is no doubt that every six months we will have to come into this place and say this is one more project that this government has managed to blow out. We are dealing with appropriation bills for things that were not expected and for which we did not put aside enough money.

Mr D.A. Templeman: Balloons are expensive this year!

Dr S.C. THOMAS: Balloons are expensive. They will be more expensive next year, most likely, because there is a two-year waiting list to do anything. Of course, the government now has more money than it has ever had. It could build nearly anything it wanted. If it wanted to build a space station, it could probably damn near build that.

Mr R.F. Johnson: They are like a load of kids let loose in a sweetshop with a load of pocket money!

Dr S.C. THOMAS: Absolutely. They have this enormous amount of pocket money that they can spend on just about anything.

Mr R.F. Johnson: But not in Hillarys!

Mr D.A. Templeman: Willy Wonka lives in Hillarys!

Mr R.F. Johnson: I get nothing in Hillarys.

Dr G.G. Jacobs: I get nothing in Roe.

Dr S.C. THOMAS: They get nothing in Roe, nothing in Dawesville and nothing in South Perth! The government is probably going to take bits out of it!

Mr M.P. Murray: They will put uranium there!

Dr S.C. THOMAS: That is going to Merredin, member for Collie-Wellington!

Mr M.P. Murray: We will share it around!

Subject: Appropriation (Consolidated Fund) Bill (no. 3) 2005 / Appropriation (Consolidated Fund) Bill (no. 4) 2005 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 23 November 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 7684b - 7699a [online (pdf)]

In another time

2007-02-06T09:18:00.000+09:00

Hon PETER FOSS: In speaking to the amendment, I would like to put to bed the concept that, if the house sits earlier, members will get more sleep. That rationale is very much like the daylight saving argument. The amount of sleep we get is determined by the amount of time available between the house’s rising and the time it commences. It is fallacious to say that we will get more sleep if the house starts earlier and rises earlier. It is almost as good an argument as that which claims the curtains will fade because of daylight saving.

Hon Kim Chance: I think I said it would get us home a little earlier.

Hon PETER FOSS: It will get us home a little earlier, but it will get us out of bed a little earlier, so we will come back to Parliament half asleep; we will have the potential for an accident on the way to work rather than on the way home. That is wonderful.

Hon Derrick Tomlinson interjected.

Hon PETER FOSS: Yes, then we would not have to go to bed at all. The government’s reasoning is fallacious in two ways. When I was in practice many years ago, and as the state would not have daylight saving, I started my own daylight saving by coming into the office an hour earlier.

Hon Derrick Tomlinson: And your curtains faded.

Hon PETER FOSS: The funny thing was that I went home at exactly the same time as I did without the daylight saving. I just worked an extra hour every day because the signal to go home was when it went dark.

Hon Kim Chance: Did you find your milk went sour?

Hon PETER FOSS: The milk went terribly sour and the curtains in my car were totally faded, but -

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT (Hon George Cash): Hon Peter Foss is speaking to the issue of the deletion of “2.30 pm” and the substitution of “3.30 pm”. I cannot understand where the milk comes into it, but I will allow a little leeway. In the end, members, Hon Peter Foss is entitled to speak to the amendment, and only that.

Hon PETER FOSS: I was referring not to milk, but to the hour. The change from 2.30 to 3.30 pm will be sensible. The entire concept of starting earlier in order not to sit later is fallacious. The amendment not only has the advantage of enabling a party room meeting of upper house members, which is highly desirable in trying to deal with things, but it gets away from the fallacious argument that starting earlier will provide more sleep. It will not. In fact, I expect the opposite to be the case.

Hon Kim Chance: We are going to agree to the amendment.

Subject: Standing Order 61(a), Sitting Times [Legislative Council - Motion]

Date: 27 April 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 721c - 731a [online (pdf)]

A Federal interjection

2007-02-05T08:20:00.000+09:00

For the past three months, this site has concerned itself with the wonder of the WA Legislative Council and Legislative Assembly, found through searching Hansard. However, today there's a slight change as we bring a Federal Government related post - and not something quoted in Hansard...

FOR six years, former Cabinet minister Amanda Vanstone has been working on a secret project to write a song of gravitas to make Australians feel proud of their country.

Senator Vanstone told The Sunday Telegraph she penned the lyrics to the tune of Land Of Hope And Glory, from Pomp And Circumstance, after she became aware of the need for more national songs.

The song - which she stresses is not intended to replace or rival Advance Australia Fair - is designed to be played alongside Waltzing Matilda and True Blue as Australian classics.

"The drafting began something like six years ago at either a Boxing Day or Australia Day lunch with a whole lot of mates," Senator Vanstone said.

"We all decided ... that we needed another song of gravitas because at school functions and things, once you've sung Advance Australia Fair, there isn't another gravitas song.

"Some ceremonies that people go to - State funerals, school break-ups, etcetera - have more than one important moment."

Senator Vanstone had her lyrics recorded by an Opera Australia singer and submitted a demo tape to Sony BMG, Australia's largest record company.

[...]

Senator Vanstone said she was yet to receive any feedback on her tape from Sony BMG.

"They didn't tell me what they thought. What did they think about it?"

[...]

The song is separated into five verses, signifying different aspects of Australia as a nation.

The first verse sums up the entire song, with the subsequent verses going into more detail.

"Indigenous Australians were here first, we are an immigration country, freedom is what we've enjoyed all our lives, and we are under southern stars - everyone knows the Southern Cross," Senator Vanstone said.

The lyrics to Under Southern Stars:

Home to first Australians,
Joined from near and far,
Shining light for freedom,
Under Southern Stars.

Nation made of many,
Bound in hope as one,
Building for the future,
Under Southern Sun.

Free and Friendly Nation,
Born of our own hand,
Peace our greatest virtue,
Mighty Southern Land.

Valiant into Battle,
Courage to the end,
Standing firm for freedom,
Loyal southern friend.

Nature's earthly heaven,
Glory for our eyes,
Ours alone those treasures,
Under Southern Skies.

Shining light for Freedom

Under Southern Stars.

With the likes of Vanstone and Houses & Motions' muse Woodhams [see: 'Budget Pie', 'I Love A Sunburn Daily' and 'Advance Australia Equal'] present in Australian politics, there is a danger of some kind of Poll Idol - but who wants to see Alexander Downer singing again?

Subject: Vanstone penned ode to Australia over six years

Date: 4 February 2007

Reference: news.com.au, with AFP

[Thanks to Dave for the story]

Not on the Orange Stage...

2007-02-04T13:15:00.000+09:00

MR RIPPER (Belmont - Treasurer) [9.39 am]: I thank the member for raising this issue. Members are not likely to find me at the Big Day Out concert, but it is an event that my sons have been to on occasions and I would be very disappointed on their behalf if the Big Day Out was affected by this insurance issue.

Mr Birney: You would make a good bouncer there.

Mr RIPPER: Does the member for Kalgoorlie think I would be okay in the mosh pit? My sons would advise him otherwise. The issue raised by the member for Rockingham -

Mr McGowan: They do not play Perry Como there.

Mr RIPPER: Is it possible to be in a mosh pit with Perry Como?

Subject: Crowd Control Insurance [Legislative Assembly - Grievance]

Date: 27 June 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 12252 [online (pdf)]

It starts with love for foliage

2007-02-03T09:06:00.000+09:00

MR HYDE (Perth) [5.57 pm]: [...] One of the most interesting issues to arise out of this debate was that raised by the opening speaker for the Opposition, the member for Greenough, in his important cultural heritage acknowledgment concerning the people of the western suburbs. He mentioned the cubbyhouses in the area and the activities that they have undertaken there. I draw members’ attention to the exceptionally rare bronzed Banksia menziesii. The name of this banksia gives some indication that it has blue-blood tendencies. It is the only one left in this area. As we all know, the red areas of Perth are slowly extending to the western suburbs. However, there is a bastion of blue-blooded Menzies-era hardwood left in this area. We need to find this bastion because I would be concerned if the Young Liberals in this Bushplan area were to put up the cubbyhouses that the member for Greenough referred to; I would be concerned if there is a Young Liberal’s cubbyhouse in this Banksia menziesii. There are no other known examples of this particular banksia between Kings Park and Bold Park. It is the Government’s priority to find out if there is a cubbyhouse in this area and what we will do about it. This is clearly one of the most important issues of this debate. The minister has already stated that the issues are underhand and completion will be forthcoming.

Sitting suspended from 6.00 to 7.00 pm

Mr HYDE: During the dinner break some other Labor members and I went out in search of this very important Banksia menziesii tree - the lone tree in the western suburbs containing a potential cubbyhouse used by the Young Liberals. We failed to find the tree, but you, Mr Acting Speaker (Mr Andrews), pointed out a Carnaby’s cockatoo on this important block of land. It is very rare, but it is on this site. Another of my colleagues on that search, the member for Albany, discovered a Gould’s goanna, and straightaway he said, “Look under there! That is a Varanus gouldii!” Another of my colleagues on that search, the member for Riverton, was a bit more adventurous. He went out on the left wing, and he said, “Hello! Under that eucalypt there is a collared sparrowhawk!” I was very impressed with my colleagues and their attachment to the flora and fauna. The coup de grâce was when the member for Eyre, with his binoculars and, being a journalist like me, his old peaked cap to aid in vision at sunset, identified the white-cheeked honeyeater. I was impressed with the performance of my Labor colleagues on this environmental stretch of land.

[...]

Mr HYDE: [...]The member for Churchlands referred to the wonderful public meetings held in nearby Hackett Hall. I have spent many an evening on the stage at Hackett Hall in a variety of Thespian pursuits, as well as in the audience, and that area certainly has an odour issue. The minister alluded to her earlier days playing soccer. I can also inform the House that the member for Albany - that wonderful spotter of Varanus gouldii - trained on that same patch of turf, McGillivray Oval. We have established that he needed to take a big breath at a certain turn with a northerly wind, but we do not know whether taking that big breath then enhanced his lung capacity and enabled him to make the Olympic team, or whether it detracted him from winning two gold medals instead of almost one.

Mr McGowan: The problem was that he always stopped in the home straight to keep an eye out for birds!

Mr HYDE: That is a very good analogy.

[...]

MR EDWARDS (Greenough) [7.14 pm]: I hope the House will allow me a little levity. The member for Perth raised a few issues about Latin pronunciation. I commend him for that, and I hope he understands my Latin. I did not quite catch the name of -

Mr Hyde: Banksia menziesii.

Mr EDWARDS: Until the member for Perth brought it to my attention, I was not aware that there was such a plant. I respect his knowledge -

Mr Hyde: It is in the EPA report.

Mr EDWARDS: I understand that, and with levity I suggest that the member find a “hydeafloria”, which is slightly pink with red overtones. It is found in various parks of Perth. We would need a bird “hyde” to see a “hydeafloria”. That is my level of humour.

Subject: Underwood Avenue Bushland [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 27 March 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 9073 - 9075 [online (pdf): p. 9073 / 9074 / 9075]

The sound of silencers

2007-02-02T08:10:00.000+09:00

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: [...] I concur with the comments of my colleague the shadow Minister for Police, the member for Kalgoorlie, about paintball. I have never played it, but it sounds like fun. I do not see that there is a problem with it, provided it is done with instruction and the proper protective clothing is worn. The game is fine as long as the necessary constraints are in place. We have had this debate many times over many years. I remember that when we were in government we were lobbied by people who wanted to be able to play paintball. Why should they not be able to play? I suppose a bit of commonsense is prevailing with the inclusion of these provisions. I suggest that mainly younger people like to play paintball. There should be some sort of age limit for young people who want to play this game. I would not want to see 10-year-olds -

Mr N.R. Marlborough: It is very physical. It should be restricted to people under 60 years of age. Never mind the young ones - keep the old ones out of it. They die without being hit.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: The old ones are more dangerous. The member for Peel would know that. The Opposition supports paintball not being illegal. We do not think it is reasonable to make it illegal.

Let us look at other parts of the Bill. I concur with the comments of my colleague the shadow Minister for Police, the member for Kalgoorlie, about silencers. He speaks a lot of sense in this place.

Ms J.A. Radisich interjected.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: What was that? The member for Swan Hills wants to interject on me. Do not raise your eyebrows at me, young lady - you cheeky thing. Mr Acting Speaker, she is raising her eyebrows at me.

Ms J.A. Radisich: Don’t call me that. You are lucky I let you get away with that.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: My friend the Minister for Small Business is returning to his seat. I feel an interjection coming on.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: Sit down and get your composure back.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: The minister’s colleague the Leader of the House wants us to keep going until 11 o’clock. I am trying to help him. I am doing my bit for the Leader of the House.

Mr R.C. Kucera interjected.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Is the Minister for Small Business trying to coax the Acting Speaker?

Mr R.C. Kucera: I am making sure that you withdraw that disgusting comment about this lady here.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: What disgusting comment? I do not make disgusting comments about young ladies.

Mr P.D. Omodei: Why don’t you call a point of order?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: If the minister thinks I made that comment, he should stand and call a point of order. I would never dream of making a disgusting comment. Gracious me! The minister should not try to verbal me. He will not get anywhere verballing me.

As I was saying about silencers -

Mrs M.H. Roberts: Silence is golden.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Silence would be golden. We would all like a bit of solitude and silence now. That was certainly on my mind half an hour ago. It would be rather nice to have some silence.

I am talking about silencers on firearms. I want to get back to the Bill before the House. I get sick and tired of distractions from members opposite, who are trying to prevent me saying the words which I want to say and which I firmly believe.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: You are the most wanton seeker of interjections who has ever spoken.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I do not know whether to take that as a compliment or an insult.

The ACTING SPEAKER (Mr A.P. O’Gorman): Members! The member for Hillarys is trying to return to the Bill. The numerous interjections from this side are preventing him doing that. I want to hear the end of his speech.

Subject: Firearms Amendment Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 2 March 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 121b - 134a [online (pdf)]

Eggciting times

2007-02-01T07:35:00.000+09:00

HON BRUCE DONALDSON (Agricultural) [2.00 pm]: This Bill amends the Marketing of Eggs Act 1945 and provides for the expiry of the Act and the dissolution of the Western Australian Egg Marketing Board before 31 December 2005. The expiry of the Act will fulfil the State’s national competition policy obligations on egg marketing. I guess we, as legislators in this place, have always been cautious about deregulating any industry. We want to ensure that the decision we make is the right one. We do not want to finish up with egg on our face!

Several members interjected.

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT: Order, members!

[...]

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: [...] Reading page after page of the bureaucratic letter, one must unscramble the fiction and the bureaucratic speak to get to the conclusions.

Hon Kim Chance: One should also not count chickens before they hatch.

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: Most certainly not. They probably poached this from another document, and just changed the wording. That is very important to understand.

Hon Simon O’Brien: Is the wording scrambled?

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: I had to unscramble it to find the facts in this piece of bureaucratic information.

Subject: Marketing of Eggs Amendment Bill 2004 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 19 August 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 5231b - 5249a [online (pdf)]

Working on the sequel

2007-01-31T07:50:00.000+09:00

A year after this...

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: [...] The parliamentary secretary may not be aware - I was not aware of this matter until it was raised with me - of the problems many our wethers and steers experience with their pizzle. Thankfully, I have not caught it! I have not been out in the paddock long enough. However, I understand it is a major problem. Pizzle rot is occurring everywhere. It is increasing rapidly and causing all sorts of problems for farmers. Is the parliamentary secretary aware of the incidence of pizzle rot in wethers and steers? Is the restricted access to the steroid testosterone impacting on producers?

Mr A.D. McRAE: I might have to defer that question!

The CHAIRMAN: The last parliamentary secretary had to phone a friend; perhaps the parliamentary secretary would like 50-50!

Mr A.D. McRAE: I polished up on my knowledge of carnal bunt and bovine spongiform encephalopathy, but I did not deal with pizzle rot! I might ask some scientists to give us that information by way of supplementary information, because at the moment we are struggling to understand the extent of the problem.

Subject: Division 11: Agriculture, $148 576 000 - [Legislative Assembly - Estimates Committee]

Date: 9 June 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 374b - 387a [online (pdf)]

They started it...

2007-01-30T07:20:00.000+09:00

Hon PETER FOSS: [...] The reason I am asking these questions is obvious. The minister knows exactly why; he just does not want to say it. He almost gags on admitting that this Bill is inconsistent with and amends the Electoral Distribution Act. The minister will not say it, because if he does not say it, it will not happen. However, he looks a bit like Basil Fawlty. Do not mention the law! It is very hard sometimes not to mention the law.

Hon Kim Chance: Especially when you goosestep!

Hon PETER FOSS: I am glad I am providing amusement -

Hon N.D. Griffiths: You are.

Hon PETER FOSS: The minister is too. I pose this question -

Hon N.D. Griffiths: You are good at posing.

Subject: Electoral Amendment Bill 2001 [Legislative Council - Committee]

Date: 6 December 2001

Hansard reference: pp. 6557 [online (pdf)]

Just Greenough

2007-01-29T09:16:00.000+09:00

Mr G. WOODHAMS: [...] Beyondblue, the national depression initiative, strongly supports this suggestion that I make. I will quote from beyondblue -

While the rate at which mental disorders occur does not differ greatly between metropolitan, rural and remote populations, the likelihood of professional help being sought is lowest among men living away from big cities.

I apologise for my ringing mobile phone, Mr Speaker.

Mr M.P. Murray: Twenty bucks.

Ms M.M. Quirk: It’s your mum again!

Mr G. WOODHAMS: I think it is Mr Kennett.

A member: I think it’s a point of order.

Mr G. WOODHAMS: It was Mr Kennett, Mr Speaker. The reference to beyondblue was an instant line to him!

Subject: Mental Health Services - Rural and Regional Areas [Legislative Assembly - Grievance]

Date: 31 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 3314b - 3317a [online (pdf)]

Why do we always come here?

2007-01-28T08:49:00.000+09:00

MR T. BUSWELL (Vasse - Deputy Leader of the Opposition) [7.08 pm]: I will be leading the opposition’s contribution to the debate on the Stamp Amendment Bill 2006, which I am sure the Treasurer is happy about. It is the opposition’s intention to support this bill. I am sure the Treasurer has noted that I am always very happy to be supportive of legislation that I think is in the public interest for a variety of reasons. I do believe that this is a case in point.

Mr P.B. Watson: Put your notes together in the car, did you?

Mr T. BUSWELL: I put my notes together in a hurry. The one difference between members on this side of the house and the member for Albany luxuriating on the government back benches is that we make a contribution to debates in this place. Every time I look over at the two members sitting opposite, it reminds me of something. I will ask my colleagues to take a step back in time to The Muppet Show, from which they may remember the two characters, Statler and Waldorf, who sat in a balcony. If they were not modelled on the two members opposite, I will take a long walk and a long leap into a very hot place! I hear them make inane comments that provide an interesting insight into their cranial activity. Every time they open their mouths we understand fully that their cranium represents the perfect definition of a vacuum; nonetheless, they are two nice gents.

The ACTING SPEAKER (Mrs J. Hughes): Can we get back to matters at hand please.

Mr T. BUSWELL: I am frantically searching for my notes but I can continue without them.

[...]

Mr E.S. Ripper: I get the feeling that you and I could do a deal on retail trading hours. Is that possible?

Mr T. BUSWELL: My portfolio responsibilities merely extend to taxation and government expenditure. Competition reform is not in my portfolio area of responsibilities. Unfortunately, I am precluded from discussing it with the Treasurer.

Mr E.S. Ripper: Who is responsible?

Mr T. BUSWELL: I will find out and let the Treasurer know.

Mr P.B. Watson: Talking about numbers, you’d be Miss Piggy.

Mr T. BUSWELL: It is lovely to see Statler again. Look at Statler and Waldorf!

Subject: Stamp Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 21 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8485d - 8497a [online (pdf)]

Intensive care

2007-01-27T10:45:00.000+09:00

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: England is the last place to go to get health service advice.

The minister managed to weasel his way onto an English breakfast television program similar to our Today show. The commentator told him to nick off because the English did not want him pinching their nurses. They have the same problem - a nurse shortage. I saw the program while I was in England recently. I got a hell of a surprise when our Minister for Health popped up.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Did he have make-up on?

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: Probably.

Mr J.N. Hyde: How many nurses did you see in the United Kingdom?

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: None; I had my wife with me.

Several members interjected.

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: I am too old for that sort of thing.

Several members interjected.

Subject: Address-in-Reply [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 14 August 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 102z - 130z [online (pdf)]

That's talking themselves down a little

2007-01-26T08:25:00.000+09:00

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: [...] I take this opportunity to commend the minister’s advisers. We are approaching the end of the parliamentary sitting and we have had some long hours. It is highly commendable that they have been available to provide advice to the minister and to members in this chamber. That should be acknowledged by members in this place.

Mr J.A. McGinty: Thank you for that.

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: They deserve acknowledgment for being prepared to be available in this place.

Mr J.A. McGinty: One of them missed out on a Jacki Weaver play tonight to be here to watch this instead!

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: How very unfortunate that she should have to come here and watch us instead! I know where I would rather be!

Subject: Acts Amendment (Advance Health Care Planning) Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Consideration in Detail]

Date: 29 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8998b - 9016a [online (pdf)]

The other Potter

2007-01-25T08:15:00.000+09:00

Hon BARBARA SCOTT: [...] I could not help but reflect when Hon Chrissy Sharp spoke this morning and said that marijuana is not harmful and should be more available. We should reflect more on the Flopsy Bunnies of Beatrix Potter. Members opposite should reconsider that story. They recommend drinking chamomile tea for stress.

Hon Christine Sharp: Lettuces.

Hon BARBARA SCOTT: The lettuces are soporific; they make people sleep. Take notice of Beatrix Potter and the Flopsy Bunnies; they provide good advice. It is much better than promoting cannabis and marijuana.

Subject: Cannabis Control Bill 2003 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 14 August 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 9930b - 9946a [online (pdf)]

Behind bars

2007-01-24T09:52:00.000+09:00

Mr BIRNEY: [...] I would like to address a couple of other issues but, as I have run out of time, I am sure the Deputy Premier wants to say a few words.

Mr Ripper: I could sit quietly and see if you are given a further opportunity to speak.

Mr JOHNSON: I would like to hear more from the member for Kalgoorlie. He has a great interest in this Bill and the upper House’s amendments.

Mr McGowan interjected.

Mr JOHNSON: I am absolutely passionate. The member for Kalgoorlie has a lot of knowledge, because Kalgoorlie is very famous for its public drinking houses.

Ms MacTiernan: I thought you were going to say he has a lot of knowledge because he has been thrown out of a lot of pubs!

Mr JOHNSON: Not at all. The member for Kalgoorlie is an extremely competent businessman and has run a very good business in Kalgoorlie.

Ms MacTiernan: It must be only meetings he gets thrown out of.

Mr JOHNSON: The member is concerned for the people in Kalgoorlie, because it has a pub on every corner. I have been to Kalgoorlie only half a dozen times, and I have been in only a couple of the pubs. I am not a big drinker, and I have never been thrown out of a pub. It is important that we hear from the member for Kalgoorlie, if only for the benefit of the member for Armadale. I am not sure that she understands this Bill. I want her to understand this Bill, because it relates to heavy drinking. It is important that every member of the House know about that.

Ms MacTiernan: Absolutely. It is good that your side of the House recognises that it might have some issues in that area.

Mr JOHNSON: I think the issues are on the minister’s side of the House.

Ms MacTiernan: We are seeking to understand some of the behaviour on your side of the House.

Mr JOHNSON: The minister can drink me under the table any day. I am not a heavy drinker.

Mr Marshall: Can you hold your drink?

Mr JOHNSON: I can certainly hold my drink.

The DEPUTY SPEAKER: Order! Members, I bring your attention back to the debate.

Mr JOHNSON: The member for Kalgoorlie is making a fantastic contribution to the debate on this Bill because he has a wide knowledge about not only this area but also many other areas.

Mr McGowan: Are you saying he is also knowledgeable about prostitution?

Mr JOHNSON: He is very knowledgeable about many things. He is a jewel in our crown.

Mr Ripper: You have convinced me; I really want to hear from the member for Kalgoorlie!

Mr JOHNSON: I have achieved something today. I am absolutely passionate. I hope that the member for Kalgoorlie continues his remarks and enlightens not only members on this side of the House but also certain members on the other side of the House.

Mr BIRNEY: I thank the member for Hillarys. I was not intending to continue, but the member has inspired me to once more bring some issues to the Deputy Premier’s attention.

Subject: Liquor Licensing Amendment Bill 2001 [Legislative Assembly - Council's Amendments]

Date: 28 November 2001

Hansard reference: pp. 6021 - 6022 [online (pdf)]

Case study

2007-01-23T11:14:00.000+09:00

Hon TOM STEPHENS: [...] I do not want to go back to the charcoal and scroll days. I hope there are no Luddites among us who are opposed to new technology. I have been inspired by the leadership of our Presiding Officer, who has made a computer available to himself. I would be concerned if the House were denying the rest of us access to that technology. I have heard that a member who was recently looking for a bookcase in the Parliament was told that there were no funds for bookcases and that if he wanted one he would have to bring in his own. He did.

Hon Derrick Tomlinson: Why would he want a bookcase when there are no books?

Hon TOM STEPHENS: He might want to read a book! We cannot have members reading books! Books are dangerous! They have been responsible for ideas creeping through society! I have heard that someone responsible for these funds for computers has said that funds cannot be allocated to members of Parliament for computers because the members who know how to use them will have an advantage over those who do not.

Hon Graham Edwards: On that basis, I think we should get rid of all our foot heaters!

Subject: Adjournment Debate - Members of Parliament Computers [Legislative Council - Adjournment Debate]

Date: 20 March 1997

Hansard reference: pp. 692 [online (pdf)]

Lock it in

2007-01-22T07:12:00.000+09:00

Mr P.D. OMODEI: Does the member know what karnal bunt is?

Ms M.M. QUIRK: I certainly do, member for Warren-Blackwood. I have a copy of the wheat industry biosecurity plan of July 2002, which notes that there has been a low level of surveillance for karnal bunt in the sampling of grain receivals. In July 2002 the risk was assessed as being relatively low. Given the observations in the budget papers, has the parliamentary secretary reassessed the threat of karnal bunt?

Mr F.M. LOGAN: At this point is it possible for me to phone a friend?

The CHAIRMAN: You may have a lifeline!

Mr F.M. LOGAN: Maybe I can go for a 50-50! I will be able to answer this question because I know the member for Girrawheen has a particular fascination with karnal bunt. I am glad that she did not get the first letters of this particular disease around the wrong way!

The CHAIRMAN: No spoonerisms around here!

Subject: Division 11: Agriculture, $120 243 00 - [Legislative Assembly - Estimates Committee]

Date: 19 May 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 288b - 303a [online (pdf)]

The need for direction

2007-01-21T08:35:00.000+09:00

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: [...] Is this a question of the manner of teaching? Is it a question of content? For example, would it be a contravention of the subclause if a music teacher taught maths, when the person was employed on condition that music only be taught because the person was competent to teach music only? I do not think that would relate to the way a person practises. If the person taught in a way that was too didactic in his or her presentation, as I would have -

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: I was just going to say that.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: That is why I used it. I gave Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich a chance to wake up, did I not, sweetheart?

Withdrawal of Remark

The DEPUTY CHAIRMAN (Hon Simon O’Brien): Order! That exchange might have been between the honourable member and Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich, in which case it was unruly. However, if I am being unfair and the honourable member was addressing the Chair, he should not do so using the term “sweetheart”!

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: I withdraw my unparliamentary language, Mr Deputy Chairman.

Subject: Western Australian College of Teaching Bill 2003 [Legislative Council - Committee]

Date: 7 May 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 2519b - 2535a [online (pdf)]

He's losing it

2007-01-20T09:24:00.000+09:00

MR E.S. RIPPER: [...] I want to go back to a point I was making before the opposition distracted me with an interjection.

Ms K. Hodson-Thomas: Did I distract you, Treasurer?

Mr E.S. RIPPER: The member for Carine is capable of that, but not on this occasion. The point that I was trying to make before -

Mr P.D. Omodei: You’re blushing!

Mr E.S. RIPPER: Not at all. The point that I was making before the opposition distracted me was -

Dr K.D. Hames: Get Ljiljanna in.

Mr E.S. RIPPER: That would not be a good idea!

Subject: Tax Relief [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 12 April 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 1619b - 1641a [online (pdf)]

Below the thunders of the upper deep

2007-01-19T09:00:00.000+09:00

Mr KUCERA: [...] Members should look at the crest of the House. Yesterday, the member for Nedlands quoted the law, which she is very fond of doing. I ask the member for Moore what honi soit qui mal y pense means.

Mr McNee: What are you asking me for?

Mr KUCERA: How many years has the member sat in this place under that crest?

Mr McNee: What sort of rubbish are you trying to drive home now?

Mr KUCERA: Honi soit qui mal y pense - evil be to him who evil thinks.

Mr McNee: It only happens when good people do nothing.

Mr KUCERA: Evil be to him who evil thinks. I love waking up the member for Moore. Mr Speaker, did you ever read that wonderful book by John Wyndham, The Kraken Awakes? We have a kraken in the House. We have moved on in this world since 1592.

Mr Logan: Some of us have.

Mr KUCERA: Yes. In fact, some of us were here then.

Subject: Acts Amendment (Lesbian and Gay Law Reform) Bill 2001 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 6 December 2001

Hansard reference: pp. 6646 [online (pdf)]

Q and not A

2007-01-18T09:52:00.000+09:00

289. Hon NORMAN MOORE to the minister representing the Minister for the Environment:

Obviously, this is question time and not answer time.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: That is why it is called question time; otherwise it would be answer time.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: I know. I would like to give notice that at the next sitting of the house we will change it to question and answer time.

Hon Kim Chance: No, I blush when I get a bad answer, and I didn’t do so then.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: The Leader of the House is blushing now, and I can understand why. I know how he feels, because I used to have a minister who did the same thing to me.

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT: Order, members! Let us move on.

Subject: Conservation Commission, Aboriginal Heritage [Legislative Council - Questions Without Notice]

Date: 19 May 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 1956b - 1956b [online (pdf)]

King of the impossible

2007-01-17T09:53:00.000+09:00

MR McGOWAN (Rockingham) [3.35 pm]: [...] I was intrigued by the comments of the member for Geraldton, who seemed to think that, on the one hand, people who did not pay their fines should go to jail, while, on the one hand, people who were speeding and were caught by Multanovas should be allowed to get off.

Mr Bloffwitch: I had a photograph in which no detective could ever recognise me, and I paid the fine. Get that clear.

Mr McGOWAN: I find it difficult to believe that no-one could recognise the member for Geraldton in a photograph, because he is a very distinctive looking fellow. I would recognise him anywhere.

Mr Omodei: Not if the flash went off the top of his head. It would have blinded the camera!

Subject: Acts Amendment (Fines Enforcement) Bill 1999 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 11 May 2000

Hansard reference: pp. 6921 [online (pdf)]

I see red...

2007-01-17T09:46:00.000+09:00

Dr K.D. HAMES: [...] Are you waving to me, Mr Speaker?

The SPEAKER: No, I was not waving to anyone.

Mr J.A. McGinty: Hello sailor!

Dr K.D. HAMES: Sweetheart! Do not put that in Hansard!

Mr J.A. McGinty: It would be the end of your career!

Mr R.C. Kucera: Are you blushing?

Dr K.D. HAMES: I am blushing.

Twice shy

2007-01-16T10:02:00.000+09:00

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: [...] Anyway, the odontologist showed us the most grotesque bite marks on the anatomies of some people. He said that the Bill had failed to state that the examination of a bite mark on a body must be made within the first 24 hours. He gave us an example of a person who had robbed a bakery overnight and had eaten a piece of chocolate cake. He was able to match the bite mark on the piece of cake to the mouth of the person from whom they had taken the - what do they call it?

Hon Nick Griffiths: Swab?

Hon BRUCE DONALDSON: No, not a swab, it was the bite mark.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: What does it start with?

Hon Derrick Tomlinson: Somebody’s teeth sinking into your skin!

Subject: Committee Reports and Ministerial Statements - Consideration [Legislative Council - Committee]

Date: 5 March 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 525d - 539a [online (pdf)]

ACME Insurance Brokers

2007-01-15T09:43:00.000+09:00

MR M. McGOWAN (Rockingham - Parliamentary Secretary) [1.07 pm]: [...] On the impact that this legislation will have, the member for Merredin commented upon a hypothetical case in which someone who wanted insurance for a horse had the phone hung up on him.

Mr B.J. Grylls: It was not a hypothetical case; it was me.

Mr M. McGOWAN: Was the phone hung up on the member?

Mr B.J. Grylls: No, the insurance broker said to me that he was not interested. As soon as I mentioned a horse and property, the insurance broker told me to ring somebody else.

Mr M. McGOWAN: What was the beep, beep, beeping? You said there was beep, beep, beeping.

Mr B.J. Grylls: I said that that may as well have been what happened.

Mr T.K. Waldron: And the roadrunner was going past at the same time!

Subject: Civil Liability Amendment Bill 2004 [Legislative Assembly - Consideration in Detail]

Date: 16 June 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 3769c - 3774a [online (pdf)]

Gets in your eyes

2007-01-14T09:23:00.000+09:00

Ms S.E. Walker: Have you ever been a smoker?

Mr J.A. McGINTY: In my youth.

Ms S.E. Walker: You look as though you have been.

Mr J.A. McGINTY: I will not lead with my chin and ask how the member for Nedlands can tell that. We are targeting all these things. I was delighted when, a month ago -

Mr R.F. Johnson: I reckon you smoked when you were pictured doing that.

Mr J.A. McGinty: Luckily I cannot see the picture the member for Hillarys is holding up.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Two of your colleagues are with you. You look like a real free-swinging hippy.

Mr J.A. McGINTY: Did the member for Hillarys ever have hair below his ears?

Mr R.F. Johnson: No; never. I was a good boy. The chap in the picture with the megaphone looking like Osama bin Laden in the other photograph is your good friend the Treasurer. You will recognise the one in the middle probably.

Ms S.E. Walker: Did he say between or below?

Mr J.A. McGINTY: Hopefully, below.

Subject: Smoking in Cars - Education Campaign [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 28 June 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 4468b - 4486a [online (pdf)]

Derailed

2007-01-13T10:06:00.000+09:00

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: [...] I thank the Leader of the House for affording me the opportunity to make this speech on my return from parliamentary business. This issue has been of great interest to me over the past 14 months. I dream railcars and rail tracks.

Mr A.P. O’Gorman interjected.

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: No, I do not want a Thomas the Tank engine or the Fat Controller for Christmas.

Subject: Railway (Jandakot to Perth) Bill 2002 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 17 September 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 1054b - 1069a [online (pdf)]

In need of a lift

2007-01-12T10:50:00.000+09:00

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: [...] There is no plan to expand health services in the country, or to meet the health needs of the hundreds of thousands of Western Australians who live, work and invest in regional Western Australia.

Dr J.M. Woollard interjected.

Mr R.C. Kucera: Member for Avon, your voice has changed.

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: I fell down the stairs.

Subject: Appropriation (Consolidated Fund) Bill (no. 1) 2003 / Appropriation (Consolidated Fund) Bill (no. 2) 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading - Cognate Debate]

Date: 14 May 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 7706c - 7749a [online (pdf)]

Housekeeping

2007-01-11T19:25:00.000+09:00

Greetings!

I'm just interrupting the flow for a few notices. First, hello to all new and returning visitors - publicity, mainly it appears from one source, is gradually increasing, and although this site at the moment is just a lot of random quotes from Western Australia's State Government between 1997 and 2006, we still hope it's somewhat entertaining.

With that in mind, at some point in February this site may change - certainly I'm looking at migrating it over to Wordpress and thus the domain and the general look of the page will change from being a standard Blogger thing. Nothing against Blogger, it's worked well (despite the two 2006s in the archives), just time to move on.

Before then, we'll try to keep the quotes coming, although there are a few obstacles that may limit them - personally I have some sort of thesis due in the next month and more importantly have steadily reduced my backlog, and similarly fun things like conferences, travel and work are also likely to keep the number of new posts down.

Still, we'll be updating whenever possible, and hopefully all the changes will be in place in time for the first sittings for 2007 of the State Government.

Anthemic Greenough for you?

2007-01-11T10:36:00.000+09:00

MR G.A. WOODHAMS (Greenough) [10.13 pm]: I notice in this house that there is often some licence to use certain language to express points of view. I choose to take licence to express a particular point of view about the Australian anthem, Advance Australian Fair. Perhaps our learned friends on the other side of the house would like to rewrite the national anthem to become Advance Australia Equal! It could be rendered: “Australians, let us all rejoice, for 57 seats have we; golden soil and wealth for toil, our home is girt by sea.” Members should feel free to sing along if they know the words. “Our land abounds in nature’s gifts of beauty rich and rare, and history’s page at every stage, Advance Australia Equal. In joyful strains then let us sing Advance Australia Equal. When gallant Gallop from Geraldton sailed to trace wide oceans over, false courage bore him on, till he landed back on our shore. Then here he raised old Labor’s flag, the standard of the red, with all his faults we love Jim still, one vote, one value rules the wave! In joyful strains then let us sing Advance Australia Equal. Beneath our radiant Parliament House, we’ll toil with hearts and hands, to make this city-state of ours, renowned of all the lands. For those who’ve come across the seas, we’ve boundless electorates to share, with courage let them all be combined, to advance Australia equal. In joyful strains then let us sing Advance Australia Equal.”

Subject: One Vote One Value Bill 2005 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 5 April 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 266b - 345b [online (pdf)]

A novel approach

2007-01-10T12:25:00.000+09:00

Hon FRANK HOUGH: [...] These are issues for which we have professionals and the public service to advise us on. The issue I am talking about is a civil issue. Another issue is water. The Water Corporation is doing a crappy job. I do not know whether I am allowed to say that in Parliament. “Crappy” is not a dirty word. It means something is not quite fixed.

Hon Nick Griffiths: It’s not very parliamentary.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: It might not be parliamentary to you, minister, but it is to me. If you are that pathetic, why not leave the Chamber?

Why do we not get proper water from the Water Corporation? Why do we have restrictions? Why not ask the people how to fix these problems? We can ask people for their views in these areas. A broader community input can be sought with CIR in several areas. When the community tells us what to do, they cannot criticise us. If 85 per cent of the community state to the Government that they want capital and corporal punishment, then so be it. That would mean that the usual 15 per cent - or is it five to 10 per cent? - would be opposed to it, but we cannot please everyone. When this motion I have moved is put, support will go hiding. At the end of day, it will be like the hounds of the Baskervilles. It will be the Scarlet Pimpernel in this Chamber. We seek him here. We seek him there. We seek him everywhere. Where can he be, that damned elusive Pimpernel? Will members vote with Frank Hough? No. “I’m indisposed.” Will the minister become the Scarlet Pimpernel?

Hon Nick Griffiths: I’d rather you did not seek me. I’ll stay here, thank you very much

Subject: Capital Punishment for Offenders of Heinous Crimes [Legislative Council - Motion]

Date: 12 November 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 12986c - 13003a [online (pdf)]

Commercial break

2007-01-09T10:23:00.000+09:00

MS K. HODSON-THOMAS (Carine) [10.47 pm]: [...] In my electorate I have some seven independent shopping centres. Carine Glades Shopping Centre is a hive of activity. It is one of the best shopping centres in Perth. If members are looking to go shopping and need to find something special, they can find it at Carine Glades Shopping Centre. I notice that the Hansard staff are smiling. I have seen many of them shopping in my electorate and at the Carine Glades Shopping Centre. It is a great place to shop. It is highly competitive and has fresh produce. If I were to compare the vegetable produce available there with what I could get at, say, Coles or Woolworths, I would have to say that in this case it is second to none. In fact, the centre was recently presented with an award in recognition of its great produce. It is a great business entity.

Mr D.A. Templeman: What is the stone fruit like?

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: The stone fruit is absolutely beautiful.

Mr D.A. Templeman: Firm peaches?

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: It has firm peaches. The member for Mandurah must travel.

Mr D.A. Templeman: Once the train is running I will be able to go up and sample the firm peaches at Carine Glades Shopping Centre.

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: It would not be a speech of mine if we did not talk about the railway! All members should go to the Carine Glades Shopping Centre. I am sure that people at the centre do not expect me to talk about it in such -

Mr D.A. Templeman: This is not a personal, paid advertisement, is it?

Subject: Retail Shops and Fair Trading Legislation Amendment Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 26 November 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 13739b - 13764a [online (pdf)]

Impish

2007-01-08T10:00:00.000+09:00

Mr M.J. COWPER: [...] I feel sorry for the people at the Fines Enforcement Registry. They must have an absolute sea of paperwork or a fantastic computer system. We have already heard from the member for Roe about how there are glitches and gremlins in the system. A classic example is sitting opposite - I had almost forgotten about the member for Ballajura!

Mr J.B. D’Orazio: You have a short memory!

Mr M.J. COWPER: I am a forgiving person!

Mr R.F. Johnson: I can’t believe he’s supporting this legislation!

Mr J.B. D’Orazio: Wait till I finish!

Subject: Fines Legislation Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 28 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8857c - 8875a [online (pdf)]

It's a start

2007-01-05T08:00:00.000+09:00

HON FRANK HOUGH (Agricultural) [5.47 pm]: I have a tremendous dilemma regarding this Bill. Although I have been in Parliament for three years this month and have been in business for 30 years, this is probably one of the most difficult issues with which I have had to deal. Like Ian Thorpe on the starting blocks, I was about to enter into the race but, unfortunately, I have fallen into the swimming pool and I do not know whether to further contribute to the race. It is most difficult.

Hon Simon O’Brien: That is where the similarity ends.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: I probably cannot swim as well as Ian Thorpe, but I have a paddle pool at home.

Subject: Human Reproductive Technology Amendment Bill 2003 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 4 May 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 2102e - 2111a [online (pdf)]

Mind and owned business

2007-01-04T07:50:00.000+09:00

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: [...] I have a great deal of sympathy for people who run small businesses. I am aware that if a person is running a small business, much of what he does relies on his ability to run that business. He cannot always replace his skills as an owner with somebody who is hired or employed. In a one or two-person business it simply cannot be done. If a person had a small business, he would make sure that -

Ms S.E. Walker: Have you ever had a small business?

The DEPUTY SPEAKER: Order, member for Nedlands!

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: If a person ever had a business, he would never, under any circumstances, employ the member for Nedlands. The last time I saw cow pats stacked as high as the member for Nedlands was in a cow paddock in India. It was a long time ago.

Ms S.E. Walker: How do you run your small business?

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: Like the member runs her small mind.

Ms S.E. Walker: I have a good mind. None of your bulldust.

Mr R.F. Johnson: She has your mark.

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: Mate, she is a legend in her own brain cell; that is her problem.

Ms S.E. Walker interjected.

The DEPUTY SPEAKER: Order, member for Nedlands!

Subject: Retail Shops and Fair Trading Legislation Amendment Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Consideration in Detail]

Date: 27 November 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 13830b - 13839a [online (pdf)]

Cereal offenders

2007-01-03T08:23:00.000+09:00

Mr B.K. MASTERS: [...] Half-yearly reports are sometimes difficult to understand by people who do not have expertise in accounting matters. Again, unless opposition members like me are on the mailing list of entities such as LandCorp and Western Power, they do not get annual reports sent to them automatically; they must visit a web site or make a phone call to have reports delivered to them.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: You are supposed to do some work in opposition.

Mr B.K. MASTERS: I appreciate that.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: You are not spoon-fed like you were in government.

Mr B.K. MASTERS: It is a different type of spoon-feeding; it is a different type of work in government.

Mr P.D. Omodei: You are on Farex and we are on Weetbix!

Mr B.K. MASTERS: I would never accuse the minister of ever being spoon-fed.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: I tell you what, mate, I do a lot more work than you guys did when you were in office.

Mr P.D. Omodei: I think you are actually on All-Bran.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: I don’t need that when you are in the House!

Mr B.K. MASTERS: If I had heard the comment, I would probably say it was very droll, but I missed it.

Subject: Western Australian Land Authority Amendment Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 17 June 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 8823b - 8828a [online (pdf)]

Straight to video sequel

2007-01-02T09:02:00.000+09:00

following on from this...

HON B.K. DONALDSON (Agricultural) [12.03 pm]: [...] I was somewhat amused the other day when the President gave a small commercial to inform members, quite rightly, of the videotapes of members’ speeches that are available at a cost of $22. My imagination started to run fairly wild, and I wondered whether in years to come a pattern would emerge in this House with the President announcing the daily specials from the dining room, the souvenir shop and possibly even from the bar in the form of packaged wines and beers. However, heaven forbid, my imagination went even wilder -

The PRESIDENT: Steady, member, steady!

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: I wondered whether we would see the day when the President would interrupt the debate at the end of an hour and say, “This hour has been proudly supported by so and so”; and I thought of Joe Bloggs’ hot air balloon safaris, for argument’s sake. The mind really boggles at what we might see one day.

Hon N.D. Griffiths: I might order a videotape of this speech.

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: It even goes further. We might have a situation like the one with Australian Football League teams and everyone else who goes onto a sporting ground these days, where we cannot see their uniforms because of all the logos of the companies that sponsor them. I guess it would never come to that, but it did give me food for thought.

Subject: Address-in-Reply [Legislative Council - Motion]

Date: 28 June 2001

Hansard reference: pp. 1530 [online (pdf)]

This year's models

2007-01-01T09:00:00.000+09:00

MR T.R. BUSWELL (Vasse - Deputy Leader of the Opposition) [4.17 pm]: [...] I know that the Treasurer is on a fairly tight time line. I know that tomorrow is his moment in the sun. He will turn up at Parliament House just before two o’clock in the afternoon in his government car. The cameras will be there. He will step out briskly and walk into the chamber. We have heard today that a photographer from The West Australian will capture the moment for posterity, so I assume that the Treasurer will need to get away early tonight for a tizzy up or some such thing.

Ms J.A. Radisich: I reckon he is looking pretty good!

Mr T.R. BUSWELL: I reckon he is looking pretty good as well. Enough indulgence. Before I go on, I should point out to the Treasurer that there has been a rumour in the corridors of Parliament -

Mr F.M. Logan: About you!

Mr T.R. BUSWELL: I am involved in it. There is a rumour that members of Parliament should come together to create an MPs calendar for sale and distribution across Western Australia to raise funds for an identified charity. It was put to me that perhaps the Treasurer and I could be the joint Mr Januarys in our Speedos or some such thing! With that thought, as I do not want to put the Treasurer off sleeping tonight, I will move on. There are a couple of serious matters -

Mr M. McGowan: Shane Warne style.

Mr T.R. BUSWELL: Yes, but will the bunny ears be up or down? I will move on.

The ACTING SPEAKER (Dr S.C. Thomas): I ask the member to move on to the substance of the debate.

Subject: Actual Government Spending and Budget Estimates [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 10 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 2513b - 2526a [online (pdf)]

Sunday's best?

2006-12-31T09:47:00.000+09:00

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: [...] I live with a greater degree of deregulation with my nearby shopping centres and small retailers. It is very popular, whether I like it or not. People go to the shopping centres in droves on Sundays. It is not just people from Rockingham; everyone from the metropolitan area comes down to shop at Rockingham on Sundays.

Mr R.F. Johnson: I don’t.

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: The member knows the rules relating to him: we will not let him come down! Is not a question of “I don’t”; it is “we will not let him”!

Adjournment of a thousand miles...

2006-12-30T07:44:00.000+09:00

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: [...] Hon George Cash is one of the most multiskilled members of this Parliament. In the four years that Hon George Cash occupied the Chair that you now occupy, Mr President, he was fettered in making comments, and I noted the other day his excitement at the freedom that he now enjoys. Hon George Cash is an excellent debater and a very intelligent person, and his contribution to this House will be of great value.

Hon N.D. Griffiths: Did he write this speech?

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: No. I also congratulate the ministers: Hon Kim Chance, the Leader of the House; Hon Tom Stephens; and my very good friend Hon Nick Griffiths.

Hon N.D. Griffiths: You can now read the part that I wrote!

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: I thank Hon Nick Griffiths for his contribution now that I have had another quick look at it.
[...]
I hope that the new members on both sides of the House have an enjoyable experience in this House. They will learn that there may be a division down the middle of the Chamber, but generally they will have a most enjoyable time in this place, as most of us get on well together. There has been some good debate in this House over time. People often ask me how we can have a worthwhile debate at three o’clock or four o’clock in the morning.

Hon N.F. Moore: With some difficulty.

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: With great difficulty. However, I remember some good debates at that time of the morning when members got their second wind in this place. I used to get annoyed when the House was wound up just before 6.00 am and we missed out on breakfast. The worst aspect of that was that most members got sucked in to stay until breakfast. I remember the first time that we sat all night when Hon George Cash told us there would be no charge for breakfast. That was not the case and we got the bill. I remember there being no marmalade for Hon Max Evans; therefore, he brought his own jar of marmalade into the House because he loved marmalade on his toast.

Hon N.D. Griffiths: You have spoken about Hon George Cash. Do you remember the occasion when he commenced the adjournment debate and then concluded it by saying, “I move that the House do not adjourn”?

Hon B.K. DONALDSON: Yes, these were very enjoyable times. I hope the new members who came into this place after the last election can enjoy the experiences that we have had. There will be some unpleasant times but that is the nature of the beast.

Subject: Address-in-Reply [Legislative Council - Motion]

Date: 28 June 2001

Hansard reference: pp. 1530 - 1531 [online (pdf): p. 1530 / p. 1531]

Froggy Highway

2006-12-29T07:45:00.000+09:00

Mr M. McGOWAN: He points out in the report that there would be a dramatic impact on fauna and flora along the route of the canal, a dramatic impact on surface hydrology, movement of fauna across the region in the area of the canal, an impact upon national parks and A-class nature reserves along the route of the canal, and a potential impact on the Ramsar Convention’s list of wetlands. In addition, 33 000 hectares of land would be cleared to build the canal. Of course, as the water was transported along the route, 200 gigalitres of water would be lost that this state -

Mr P.D. Omodei interjected.

The SPEAKER: I call the Leader of the Opposition to order.

Mr P.D. Omodei interjected.

The SPEAKER: I call the Leader of the Opposition to order for the second time.

Mr M. McGOWAN: We would lose 200 gigalitres of water along the route every year, which this state can ill afford to lose, and it would be environmentally disastrous. It gets worse. This report directly refers to the canal being an opportunity for what it terms dangerous biota to move along its length. Dangerous biota is basically cane toads.

Several members interjected.

Mr C.J. Barnett: Cane toads coming down the canal! Cane toads in swimmers surfing along the canal!

Mr M. McGOWAN: The member for Cottesloe thinks he is not only C.Y. O’Connor, but also Ferdinand de Lesseps. Now he thinks he is David Suzuki. He knows everything about engineering and the environment. The member for Cottesloe knows everything about these things. There is a prospect that cane toads will come from the north of the state into backyards and the wilderness areas and wetlands of the southern part of this state under this proposal.

Several members interjected.

The SPEAKER: I call the member for Cottesloe to order again and the member for Roe.

Mr M. McGOWAN: This report refers directly to that prospect. Anyone who has seen cane toads will understand that they are an ecological disaster. We do not need a cane toad autobahn transporting them from the north to the south of the state. This canal would be a river of ecological ruin. Fortunately, the people of the state recognised that at the last state election when they gave us a thumping victory.

Subject: Appleyard Report [Legislative Assembly - Questions Without Notice]

Date: 3 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 2089c - 2090a [online (pdf)]

Grim tales

2006-12-28T10:15:00.000+09:00

HON DERRICK TOMLINSON (East Metropolitan) [3.02 pm]: I am not sure how to characterise this Bill. Bearing in mind that the second reading speech summarises the intent of the Bill, if one reads the minister’s second reading speech and loses sight of the Bill itself, it could be characterised as a “Mary Poppins Bill” - a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down in the most delightful way. If one is distracted by the eloquence of the second reading speech and does not pay attention to the contents of the Bill, it might be characterised as an “It will not hurt, did it Bill” because a person does not know what he is getting until after he has had it. It is only when the consequences are examined that the person knows what it is that he had. The third way of characterising this Bill -

The CHAIRMAN: Order, members!

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: I apologise to honourable members who are trying to carry on with their conversations. My voice does tend to intrude into their conversations but I shall try to reduce its timbre.

Hon Nick Griffiths: I can assure Hon Derrick Tomlinson that I was listening to his every word. I know that he, like I did, enjoyed the Mary Poppins movie many years ago and a spoonful of sugar does help the medicine go down. There is another long word I could use but I will not say it because I might get it wrong.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: The minister cannot help but listen to what I have to say because the whole world hears what I say. I want to make sure he absorbs what I have to say.

The third way of characterising this Bill is as the “Little Red Riding Hood Bill”.

Hon Nick Griffiths: And you are the big bad wolf.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: No, I am Little Red Riding Hood. Members know what happened to Little Red Riding Hood. On her way to Grandma’s house, with the express warning from her mother to beware of the wolf in the woods, poor Little Red Riding Hood was spied on by the wolf in the woods. Instead of the wolf jumping out and doing what wolves do to little maidens in the wood, he decided to go to Grandma’s house and disguise himself as someone else. He disguised himself as Grandma and decided to impose an intelligence test upon Little Red Riding Hood.

Hon Nick Griffiths: You are the big bad wolf.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: No, I am Little Red Riding Hood. As we all know, the big bad wolf did something to Grandma - stuffed her into the cupboard or under the bed - and then dressed himself in her nightclothes and jumped into her bed. Totally oblivious to this, Little Red Riding Hood came into the house, saw Grandma in bed and said “Oh Grandma, what big eyes you have.” Grandma responded by saying “All the better to see you with, my dear.” Little Red Riding Hood failed the first test. She then said “Oh Grandma, what big ears you have.” Grandma responded “All the better to hear you with, my dear” and Little Red Riding Hood failed the second test. Can members imagine the situation; there is a wolf in the bed with more hair on his face than Hon Frank Hough or Hon Simon O’Brien and Little Red Riding Hood does not even twig that Grandma is a wolf; she must have been the original bimbo. Eventually Little Red Riding Hood said “Oh Grandma, what big teeth you have.” At that stage the wolf jumped out of bed, exposed himself, Little Red Riding Hood screamed, the woodman came in, dispatched the wolf and carried off Little Red Riding Hood. This Bill is a “Little Red Riding Hood Bill”.

Subject: Fire and Emergency Services Legislation Amendment Bill 2001 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 19 September 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 1253b - 1257a [online (pdf)]

I... have no words.

2006-12-27T19:19:00.001+09:00

Mr G. WOODHAMS to the Minister Assisting the Minister for Education and Training:
I acknowledge the presence in the house today of students from Nagle Catholic College and Mt Tarcoola Primary School.

It is with some trepidation that I ask this question in bakery parlance, because the person to whom I am about to address my question is more like a mud cake to my matchstick presence.

Several members interjected.

Mr G. WOODHAMS: It should be a process of self-identification, Mr Speaker. No-one knows who I am talking about yet. My question without notice is to the Minister Assisting the Minister for Education and Training. Given small business concerns, particularly in the mid-west, about shortening the length of apprenticeships from four to two years and the subsequent drain of trainees to the mining industry and other parts of the state as a result of the resources boom, I ask -

(1) Is the minister aware that Geraldton’s biggest employer of engineer apprentices, D-Trans Motor Body Builders and General Engineers, now refuses to hire new apprentices because it is not receiving a long-term return from its investment?

(2) Will the minister consider a bonding program to ensure that businesses do not lose apprentices after underwriting their training?

(3) What other initiatives does the minister propose to help small businesses retain trained apprentices in the mid-west?

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH replied:

(1)-(3) The mud cake has arrived.

Ms A.J.G. MacTiernan: You are so tasty!

Several members interjected.

The SPEAKER: Order!

Mr N.R. MARLBOROUGH: Even I am turning red.

Subject: Apprentices - Retention by Employers [Legislative Assembly]

Date: 31 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 3342b-3343a [online (pdf)]

Would you like that straight up, or with tonic?

2006-12-27T18:56:00.000+09:00

Mr C.J. Barnett: Where is the Speaker?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I am sure the Acting Speaker has the same serious concerns as I do about the damage that cannabis does to children. I know that the member for Joondalup, the Acting Speaker, has children, and in the not-too-distant future he will probably have grandchildren.

The ACTING SPEAKER (Mr A.P. O’Gorman): I hope not.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Of course you will, Mr Acting Speaker. The not-too-distant future could be five or 10 years; that is not a long time. This is the problem and this is why we on this side of the House do not agree with the suspension of standing orders just so the Leader of the House can guillotine this Bill and go home. I wonder whether the Leader of the House has instructions from the Premier to guillotine this Bill because he does not want to be up all night. He had a lovely kip last night with teddy, and he does not want to be in the Chamber tonight; he wants to be home with teddy again.

The ACTING SPEAKER: Member for Hillarys!

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: That is what I reckon. I am giving the reason that I am opposed to the suspension of standing orders. That is my view. We have had a slight glimpse of the Premier. It looked like the Premier. I think it was the Premier.

Mr P.G. Pendal: We are very worried about teddy. Who is teddy?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I want to know what teddy’s name is. I think the Premier is one of those people who would have a teddy. I wonder whether this debate will also be gagged. The Leader of the House is a compulsive gagger, because he has gagged debate all night long. So far he has gagged every clause apart from one. We did not take long to deal with that clause and we dealt with it quite legitimately. We felt that that clause should be passed fairly quickly and we scrutinised it very carefully.

Mr P.G. Pendal: He should have been given a GIN.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: What is that?

Mr P.G. Pendal: A gaggers infringement notice.

Subject: Cannabis Control Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Consideration in Detail]

Date: 16 April 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 6848b-6932a [online (pdf)]

Through a long and sleepless night

2006-12-26T07:56:00.000+09:00

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Once again, this is why I am saying that we should suspend standing orders now. I moved the motion because the Leader of the House wants to debate it at some time in the future - tomorrow. We do not have a clue for how long we will sit tomorrow. We do not know for how long we still sit this evening. We did not know for how long we would sit last evening. I got to bed this morning at twenty to four. My little teddy bear was getting very lonely!

Mr R.C. Kucera: Obviously you didn’t get your beauty sleep.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I did not. The member for Yokine has missed his for years, by the looks of it.

The SPEAKER: Now, now!

Subject: Standing Orders Suspension [Legislative Assembly - Business of the House - Motion]

Date: 6 April 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 423b - 428a [online (pdf)]

Festive message

2006-12-24T12:30:00.000+09:00

THE SPEAKER (Mr F. Riebeling): I thank members for their contribution to the adjournment debate. I now get the opportunity as Speaker to speak in an unusual set of surroundings. I never thought I would be standing here on the last day of any Parliament speaking to a red chamber rather than the more traditional blue chamber. I thank the Council for allowing us to use this chamber. No doubt we will use it again when we return in February; hopefully, for only one week’s sitting.

[...] I hope that I do not have anxious nights in January worrying about whether the deadline will be met. Members should not worry about it; but I should and I will. If it does not work out it is only a short-term issue; whatever problems arise will be fixed in about 80 years!

[...]

I thank everyone and I wish everyone a merry Christmas and a happy new year. If we all drink in moderation, we will all return safe and healthy. I am sure those are the thoughts of everyone. I thank both sides of the chamber for their support during the year. Some members have been a little noisier than others, but if we have no passion, we might as well not be here. I thank everyone for their efforts and look forward to next year in a brand-new chamber. If there are any scratches on the chairs, we will know who did it! I look forward to the start of the next parliamentary year.

Subject: Adjournment of the House [Legislative Assembly]

Date: 12 December 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 9397c - 9402a [online (pdf)]

Now we're going somewhere

2006-12-24T08:41:00.000+09:00

HON KIM CHANCE (Agricultural - Leader of the House) [6.36 pm]: I move -

That the house do adjourn to a time and place of the President’s -

THE PRESIDENT: This is very tempting, Leader of the House; we might be going somewhere exotic.

Hon KIM CHANCE: No. Without notice, I move -

That the house at its rising adjourn until a date and time to be fixed by the President.

Hon Norman Moore: I like the bit about the place!

Hon KIM CHANCE: Acapulco? We will start with As.

The PRESIDENT: I do not want to interrupt the Leader of the House, but I hope he is successful in getting the appropriate appropriations so that we can give that consideration!

Hon KIM CHANCE: I have already made a small start on that, Mr President, to be fair!

The PRESIDENT: Please commence your promise!

Hon KIM CHANCE: Thank you, Mr President.

Subject: Adjournment of the House [Legislative Council - Special]

Date: 7 December 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 9343c - 9350a [online (pdf)]

You and I, Cutiepie

2006-12-23T17:27:00.000+09:00

Mr P.B. Watson: They know. You went to Albany and said that deregulation was inevitable.

Mr C.J. BARNETT: No, I did not.

Mr P.B. Watson: Yes, you did.

Mr C.J. BARNETT: No, I did not; I know exactly what I said. As the member and I are engaging in debate, why do we not go to Albany in the next couple of months and publicly debate trading hours?

Mr P.B. Watson: No worries.

Mr C.J. BARNETT: It is a date. Can the member for Bunbury and I do it in Bunbury? Let us go to Bunbury and debate trading hours. Is the member willing to do that? Come on, we can debate trading hours.

Mr A.J. Dean: As long as Geoff Prosser and Dan Sullivan are there.

Mr C.J. BARNETT: No, just the member and I.

Mr A.J. Dean: Do you know that the man most likely to win out of deregulation is Geoff Prosser, your number one Liberal in Western Australia?

Mr C.J. BARNETT: Just the member and I. Come on cutie-pie; we can debate trading hours in the member’s electorate of Bunbury.

Subject: Stamp Amendment (Budget) Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 10 June 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 8479b - 8500a [online (pdf)]

I'm trying to picture it...

2006-12-23T15:23:00.000+09:00

Hon NORMAN MOORE: [...] They did not have the nerve - that is what it came down to - but I was prepared to do what had to be done in Western Australia. It demonstrated for all to see that the vast majority of students on every campus in Western Australia did not want to be a member of the guild and they did not join the guild.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich interjected.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: They did not join and they did not use the facilities either.

Hon Graham Giffard: Yes, they did.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: They used the facilities that were being run by the guild as commercial activities. They went to the tavern, for example, where 17-year-olds were taught how to drink.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: Oh!

Hon NORMAN MOORE: Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich should not give me that nonsense. She should visit the tav one day and see what goes on there. She will get some idea of the wonderful things that are happening to people at the University of Western Australia!

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: I used to work in the tav.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: I hope she did not teach some of the young people the things that I know about.

Subject: Acts Amendment (Student Guilds and Associations) Bill 2002 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 18 December 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 4468b - 4483a [online (pdf)]

Sands of time

2006-12-23T12:00:00.000+09:00

MS K. HODSON-THOMAS (Carine) [4.18 pm]: I was hoping to receive the call in time to acknowledge my son who was in the public gallery; however, he has left.

Mr C.J. Barnett: He is off to the beach; that is what daylight saving is about!

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: Yes, he is off to the beach.

The DEPUTY SPEAKER: I am sorry, member for Carine; you were beaten on the voices. I am sure he is here in spirit.

Mr C.J. Barnett: He will be back for dinner in an hour.

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: He is lucky if his mother prepares him a home-cooked meal, because she is never quite sure when he will be home!

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders Suspension - Motion]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

Sure of the dead

2006-12-23T11:09:00.000+09:00

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: As the minister is obviously aware, that is a recent Act. What was in the mind of the minister when she brought that Bill into Parliament concerning leaving a child unsupervised? Was there a specific time frame? Did it concern leaving a child unsupervised when a parent popped into a neighbour’s house to check on something or when she went to pick up another child? It is a bit of a job getting a baby in and out of a baby seat in a car.

Mr P.G. Pendal: That is the same as murder; you have been told that because that is what is in the schedule.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Exactly, but it cannot be the same as murder.

Mr P.G. Pendal: One would not think so.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Murder is pretty definite.

Mr P.G. Pendal: It is a bit.

Subject: Working With Children (Criminal Record Checking) Bill 2004 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 26 October 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 7273i - 7309a [online (pdf)]

Farewell to a free speech...

2006-12-22T18:49:00.000+09:00

THE PRESIDENT (Hon J.A. Cowdell): Normally on a Thursday we would proceed to the consideration of committee reports, but we do not have any reports for consideration. Before we proceed to orders of the day I have a commercial. I have been advised that all Council proceedings are now videotaped and that members may order a copy of their speeches at a cost of $22 each, or a copy of Hon Peter Foss’s speech if they did not get the point earlier in the day.

Hon Derrick Tomlinson: For $66.

The PRESIDENT: I inform members of that excellent service that is now available.

Subject: Videotaping of Proceedings [Legislative Council - Statement by President]

Date: 21 June 2001

Hansard reference: pp. 1285 [online (pdf)]

The yeast of their worries?

2006-12-19T14:20:00.000+09:00

HON PAUL LLEWELLYN (South West) [3.50 pm]: [...] Even in this wealthy economy we have a very small amount of capital to invest in infrastructure and we end up with the Vegemite plan; that is, to invest thinly across all sectors. Every now and then there is a patch of thick Vegemite and it does not taste very nice. That is the model we are using - the Vegemite model of regional planning and asset investment.

Hon Murray Criddle interjected.

Hon PAUL LLEWELLYN: I like Vegemite. In fact, I have Vegemite and jam but I do not want to go into that because I know we have a very short -

Several members interjected.

Hon PAUL LLEWELLYN: Vegemite and marmalade is the best thing. Sick, sick, sick! Time is short and I would like to put forward an amendment to the motion that synthesises the intention of both government and opposition to move forward. I will do that in a minute. Of course, I would have liked 45 minutes to expand -

Hon Robyn McSweeney: No!

Subject: Infrastructure and Development in Rural and Regional Western Australia [Legislative Council - Motion]

Date: 30 August 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 5389c - 5406a [online (pdf)]

Not caned but able

2006-12-19T14:10:00.000+09:00

Hon FRANK HOUGH: [...] A perpetrator does not wake up one morning and say “I am going to be a thief because I need the money”. Most perpetrators have probably come through school having nicked things. If I got out earlier enough I used to go through everyone’s school bags at lunchtime because mum would give me only vegemite sandwiches. If someone had ham and cheese sandwiches I used to grab them and replace them with my vegemite sandwiches. I am a justice of the peace. I do not even have a traffic charge recorded against my name. I do not have a criminal record. I thought I would tell members that.

Several members interjected.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: If I have to do time for that vegemite sandwich, so be it! If I am sent forth to get one lash of the cane for what I did at school, I am prepared to accept it.

Hon John Fischer: I believe the President of the Parliament probably has the power to act on that!

The PRESIDENT: Order! I am sure we have a committee to deal with such a matter.

Subject: Convicted Offenders, Corporal Punishment [Legislative Council - Motion]

Date: 11 June 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 8558b - 8563a [online (pdf)]

Definitely the right room for an argument

2006-12-19T14:00:00.000+09:00

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: [...] It is a shame that the Government has not done more for tourism in Western Australia, particularly for those people who are suffering. I have just returned from the south west -

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: Minister for Tourism, what did the ratings ever do for us?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Is the Minister for Planning and Infrastructure suggesting that the Minister for Tourism is Monty Python?

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: I am not suggesting that the minister is.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I thought perhaps the minister was. It was rude of the Minister for Planning and Infrastructure to refer to her colleague like that.

The SPEAKER: Members, I do not wish to order a stoning!

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Absolutely! Mr Speaker, will you please protect me from the Minister for Planning and Infrastructure?

Subject: Western Australian Tourism Commission Amendment Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 18 June 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 8877c - 8884a [online (pdf)]

Happier days?

2006-12-13T19:53:00.000+09:00

Ah, a reshuffle in time for Christmas. Cheers Ljiljanna, honours would be on the way but apparently the OBE's got a bit lost...

Hon NORMAN MOORE: [...] I find it interesting that the Labor Party, which I suspect has more positions on this matter than the Kamasutra -

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: How would you know? Have you read the Kamasutra?

Hon NORMAN MOORE: I have and I am familiar with the lot of them!

The PRESIDENT: Order! Let us not get distracted.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: You just don’t look like that sort of bloke.

Hon Peter Foss interjected.

The PRESIDENT: Order! If the honourable minister and Hon Peter Foss wish to discuss this matter further, they can do so without the Leader of the Opposition.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: Is it not extraordinary the things that excite the Minister for Local Government! Just the mention of the Kamasutra made her almost jump out of her chair. That might be number 459!

Subject: Retail Trading Hours Amendment (Referendums) Bill 2004 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 23 November 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 8388c - 8395a [online (pdf)]

Putting the mochas on

2006-12-13T00:10:00.000+09:00

Mr T. BUSWELL: [...] The Treasurer said that daylight saving will help to make this state more energetic and engaging and a better place for tourists to visit. I accept that may be a valid argument. However, I mulled over that and asked what state in Australia would I regard as an energetic and exciting state from a tourism perspective. The answer is Queensland - the Gold Coast and Cairns.

Ms J.A. Radisich: Victoria.

Mr T. BUSWELL: Victoria is hardly the tourism capital of Australia! I know that for the inner city, latte sipping Labor sorts, a trip to Melbourne -

Mr J.B. D’Orazio: That is what you are.

Mr T. BUSWELL: I come from a regional centre where we grind our way out of the dirt.

Mr J.B. D’Orazio: I saw you sipping latte.

Mr T. BUSWELL: By the bye, I am a flat-white fellow - I cannot pronounce “latte”.

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders Suspension - Motion]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

It was bound to be there...

2006-12-12T18:38:00.000+09:00

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: [...] I love it when the Minister for Planning and Infrastructure interjects on me, because it always gives me a second wind. She knows better than to interject on me but she never learns.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: Yes, but we live in hope that one day you will learn.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: No. One day the minister will learn that she should not let her mouth run ahead of her brain. She should do it the other way round: she should think what she is going to say and then say it; and in many cases perhaps she should not say it. Then we would get through legislation quicker. The Minister for Planning and Infrastructure is a friend of mine and I like her. I do not like saying these things about her. However, I want to get back to this Bill, because it is important, and I seriously mean that.

Ms A.J. MacTiernan: The only Bill you are interested in is the one on television at 7.30 pm on a Tuesday.

Ms S.M. McHale: At 8.30 pm.

Subject: Children and Community Development Bill 2003 [Legislative Assembly - Consideration in Detail]

Date: 4 March 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 412b - 428a [online (pdf)]

That's Greenough

2006-12-10T19:24:00.000+09:00

DR S.C. THOMAS (Capel) [3.55 pm]: I thank you, Madam Deputy Speaker, for the opportunity to debate the Premier’s Statement. I, like everybody else, congratulate the member for Willagee on his rise to the top. Actually, I congratulate the member for Geraldton for being appointed to the most important job and the member for Willagee for being appointed to the second most important job. I am sure that the member for Geraldton will gradually move down those benches as time goes by. The member for Greenough referred to Arnold Schwarzenegger. He compared himself to him -

Mr G.A. Woodhams: He is my twin!

Dr S.C. THOMAS: The member for Greenough said that he was not like Arnold Schwarzenegger, so I was wondering whether it meant he will not be back! That was a little aside for the entertainment of the massive crowd here today!

Subject: Premier's Statement [Legislative Assembly - Consideration -- Motion]

Date: 9 March 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 222b - 242a [online (pdf)]

Hello sailor

2006-12-09T20:57:00.000+09:00

MS K. HODSON-THOMAS (Carine) [4.25 pm]: [...] I know that because I can see the area from my hotel room at the Ocean Centre Hotel.

Ms A.J.G. MacTiernan: Are we staying at the same hotel?

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: We are indeed, Minister for Planning and Infrastructure. It is a great outlook from there. I must admit that I enjoyed looking out at the port last night and at the twinkling of the starboard and port markers.

Ms A.J.G. MacTiernan: I love it when you talk nautical!

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: People know that I have a great affinity with the ocean and for boating, which I love. It is a great leisure activity, and Geraldton is renowned for it. That revitalisation is very important to all in Geraldton. Therefore, I support the Minister for Planning and Infrastructure. I know members on the other side are surprised, because I am not often known to support her, but I have a high regard for the work she does.

I also enjoy the outlook from what is a fantastic tribute initiated by Rotary, the HMAS Sydney memorial. I walked up there with a couple of colleagues this morning; it is a beautiful walk.

Mr J. McGrath: We jogged up!

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: No, we did not jog up. I am sure the member for South Perth would not have made the hill!

The DEPUTY SPEAKER: Misleading the Parliament - tut-tut!

Subject: Railway Discontinuance Bill (No. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - second reading]

Date: 30 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 3189b - 3205a [online (pdf)]

Well, it's possibly more relevant than the Baghdad example

2006-12-09T19:34:00.000+09:00

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I am speaking today for a particular reason. The people who have taken the time to e-mail and contact us have gone out of their way. I need to record in this debate the fact that so many people have made the effort to contact us. I want to present these e-mails to the house so that the statistics will be recorded in Hansard forever. As I have said, my office has received more than 5137 e-mails. We have been very careful to ensure that if two e-mails have been sent from the same email address, we delete the second one so that we do not get a figure that is not true and accurate.

Mr B.J. Grylls: Your poor staff!

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: Yes! I was going to get to that. Ailsa, who is in the public gallery, and the other staff members in my office have had an absolute bugger of a week. They have said to me, “No more private members’ bills, please!”

Mr R.F. Johnson: What did you say?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I said, “See you next week!” I want to present these e-mails to the Parliament. I am not sure whether I can table them for those members who want to see them. As I have said, 96 per cent of the e-mails are in favour of daylight saving.

Mr R.F. Johnson: You can seek leave to lay them on the table for the balance of this day’s sitting.

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I do not want them to be taken out of the chamber and made public.

Mr R.F. Johnson: No. If you seek leave to lay them on the table for the balance of this day’s sitting, they cannot be taken out of the chamber.

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: For the record, the e-mails that I am holding up are the ones that we have received in opposition to daylight saving. The two boxes of e-mails are the ones that we have received in support of daylight saving. I say that because I do not want to be accused of not presenting both cases.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Did you print them all off?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: Yes.

Mr R.F. Johnson: What a waste of paper!

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: This is an important issue.

Mr B.J. Grylls: Daylight saving will lead to the loss of old-growth forests!

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (No. 2) 2006 [Standing Orders Suspension - Motion]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

Disorganised religion

2006-12-08T17:01:00.000+09:00

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: [...] In Western Australia, people can commit a crime and be fined, but they will not need to pay the fine, and they will not go to prison! That is the new slogan from the Attorney General! I am sure the Attorney will get the criminals’ vote, because anything that will save them money they will vote for.

Mr R.C. Kucera: People in prison do not get a vote.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Not all the criminals are in prison.

Mr R.C. Kucera: No. They are in car parks.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I would not go down that track if I were the member! The member should not start talking about these things, because he might leave himself wide open! God said: come unto me with clean hands. That is what God would be saying to the member for Yokine.

Mr T.G. Stephens: I do not remember that! Where is that in the scriptures?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: In other words, the member for Yokine should not make accusations. Unless he is as white as the driven snow -

Mr T.G. Stephens: What section of the scriptures is that from?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: It is from the “Johnson Bible”. It is saying that we should avoid hypocrisy. The member may not understand the subtlety of the meaning -

Mr T.G. Stephens: I would stick to the authorised version if I were you!

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I am happy to explain it to the member. My colleague, who I believe was going to go into a monastery at one time -

Mr T.G. Stephens: No. You have got that wrong.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: That is what I heard.

Mr T.G. Stephens: Well, you got it wrong.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: I thought the member was going to be a monk or something.

Mr T.G. Stephens: No. It was something much more profound than that.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: What was the member going to be?

Mr T.G. Stephens: What was I going to be?

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Yes - when the member grows up! What was the member going to be when he grew up?

Mr T.G. Stephens: Sorry. I am missing the question.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: What was the member going to be? The member was going to be something in a religious order.

Mr T.G. Stephens: Was I? You are telling the story. You have got it all wrong.

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: That is what I was told.

Mr T.G. Stephens: You have got it all wrong so far. However, this is off the point. You have digressed by your misquoting of the sacred scriptures -

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: No. I am just quoting from the “Johnson Bible”, which says that God said: come unto me with clean hands. The meaning of that is that if we want to lay a complaint against someone, we should make sure we have clean hands ourselves - we might have some tomato ketchup on our hands, or something!

Mr T.G. Stephens: The thing I have learnt about you is that when you have nothing to say, you become desperate for interjections!

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: Not at all. I am just having a bit of fun. I have just said that I have virtually completed my remarks. If the member for Yokine had not interjected on me, I probably would have finished by now. The member for Central Kimberly-Pilbara then interjected on me, and I could not resist -

Mr C.J. Barnett: It is nearly Christmas! You can make your Christmas speech now!

Mr R.F. JOHNSON: My Christmas speech will come later!

Subject: Fines Legislation Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 28 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8857c - 8875a [online (pdf)]

Applied economics

2006-12-07T18:49:00.000+09:00

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: [...] Employing security staff is an extra cost for show organisers. I have to disagree with my good mate the member for Wagin; there is too much security at the Dowerin Field Day. In that situation, we do not need that level of security. However, if the organisers are expecting 200 people to turn up at the bar, there has to be X number of security. That is an enormous cost. In addition, where will we find that level of security staff? It is a good thing I have run out of voice.

Mr G. Snook: We will have to get the Irish barmaid to check you out.

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: I wish you would. I am still single, so I am allowed to be checked out.

Mr G. Snook: There is a big problem.

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: It has something to do with supply and demand!

Mr G. Snook: You are getting your ambitions mixed up with your capabilities.

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: Exactly. We will not go down that road and waste 30 seconds of the poor barmaid’s time!

Subject: Liquor and Gaming Legislation Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 17 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7050b - 7094a [online (pdf)]

Politics, on the edge...

2006-12-07T09:29:00.000+09:00

Ms MacTIERNAN: [...] In a number of the cases I brought to this Parliament, the government agencies - that is, the Real Estate and Business Agents Supervisory Board, the Settlement Agents Supervisory Board, the ministry - point blank refused to provide any assistance whatsoever to the elderly people who had been defrauded of every penny they had. Lawyers - even some from the most conservative legal firms in this State - were so horrified by the travesty that had been perpetrated by the failure of the Minister's department and agencies to deal with it, that they acted on a pro bono basis for these clients.

Mr Shave: What do you mean by that?

Ms MacTIERNAN: I will translate it: It means free of charge.

Mr Riebeling: The lead singer with U2!

Subject: Real Estate and Business Agents Amendment Bill [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 8 April 1998

Hansard reference: p. 1709 [online (pdf)]

You know you're going to at least search for him in the contact directory now

2006-12-06T17:27:00.000+09:00

Mr A.J. SIMPSON: [...] I also mentioned that people are able to contact me via MSN. The idea behind using MSN was that it was the latest way of getting in touch with people. I can also be contacted by SMS, which is how many kids communicate. It is kind of a shame, because people will probably lose their communication skills by using SMS. The beauty of e-mail and SMS is that one can choose whether to answer a message today or tomorrow. It is not like the phone ringing and having to talk to someone. That is the way kids communicate these days. I thought that if I could provide this service, I might be able to capture more of the youth market as a member of Parliament. It would enable them to talk to me and me to talk to them and hopefully answer their questions. I probably average a dozen messages a week. Some weeks I get a lot and other weeks I get only two or three. I am sometimes asked straightforward questions. One kid asked me the other day about how to get a skate park in his area. [...] After about a 20-minute conversation, this kid knew a lot more about politics, how the system works and how to chase up getting a skate park. He probably cannot vote for me for another four or five years, but that is beside the point. I think he was happy to do that.

Mr A.D. McRae: He would be a Labor voter anyway.

Mr A.J. SIMPSON: I do not know. If he is using the Internet and telecommunications, he is probably more likely to be a Liberal voter.

Mr M.P. Murray: Do you know the difference between a Labor voter and a computer? With computers you only have to punch in the information once.

Subject: Criminal Code Amendment (Cyber Predators) Bill 2005 [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 8 November 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 6891b - 6907a [online (pdf)]

Yokine and context - sometimes irrelevant, often quotable

2006-12-06T08:32:00.000+09:00

MR M.J. COWPER (Murray) [5.43 pm]: [...] A situation developed back in 2003 for New Zealanders. I take a bit of an issue with members of the house who said today that New Zealanders usually copy what happens in Australia. I enjoy from time to time - particularly when the rugby is on - giving our Anzac cousins across the Tasman Sea a bit of a touch up, particularly the wife of one of my best mates who is of Kiwi origin. I enjoy from time to time giving them a bit of a going over, just for the fact that they are Kiwis. Whether we are Kiwi or Australian, it is almost a traditional sport to beat up on each other.

Mr R.C. Kucera: Do you realise what you have just said about your mate’s wife?

Mr M.J. COWPER: What; that she was a Kiwi?

Mr R.C. Kucera: No, before that.

Mr M.J. COWPER: I have no idea.

Mr J.C. Kobelke: Check it in Hansard.

Mr M.J. COWPER: I will check it in Hansard and have a bit of a laugh. Okay? However, I can assure the member for Yokine that there was nothing -

An opposition member interjected.

Mr M.J. COWPER: The member for Yokine needs to get his mind out of the gutter.

Mr R.C. Kucera: I wasn’t having a shot. I don’t think you realise what you said.

Subject: Road Traffic Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 29 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8958b - 8983a [online (pdf)]

Making friends for Nigel

2006-12-05T18:57:00.000+09:00

HON PETER COLLIER (North Metropolitan) [11.21 am]: The debate on the Daylight Saving Bill (No. 2) 2006 has consumed a considerable amount of time of this house and I do not intend to go through every issue that was raised. There has been an enormous amount of uniformity in the issues that have been presented. I thank members for their contribution to this debate.

Hon Ken Travers: Felsy introduced new arguments.

Hon PETER COLLIER: Arguments on both side of the daylight saving issue are valid. However, an issue such as daylight saving ignites passion like very few others. People feel very passionate about daylight saving. Unfortunately, it impacts upon relationships and friendships. I know that it has seriously tested my friendships.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: It would not mean much.

Hon PETER COLLIER: I am talking about friendships not inside this chamber, but outside the chamber.

Several members interjected.

Hon PETER COLLIER: That is right, I am a Nigel-no-friends. Call me Nigel!

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 16 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8335b - 8376a [online (pdf)]

Avoiding the temptation of posting just the reply

2006-12-05T09:55:00.000+09:00

Mr R.C. KUCERA: [...] When people are reported and the police act on it, 99 times out of a 100 they will admit to the police that this occurred and the necessity to go to court is no longer there. The worst thing we can do to a hoon is not fine him-

Mr R.F. Johnson: Will you move your microphone, because it is rubbing against something?

Mr R.C. KUCERA: I am sorry. I am playing with it.

Mr R.F. Johnson: It sounds like you have indigestion.

Mr R.C. KUCERA: As a matter of fact I have.

Subject: Road Traffic Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 29 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8958b - 8983a [online (pdf)]

Before Greenough, there was...

2006-12-04T15:05:00.000+09:00

MR OMODEI (Warren-Blackwood) [12.53 pm]: It is grand final time again in the lower south west and I have penned the following prose, with apologies to Banjo. It goes like this -

It was somewhere down the country in the land of tall, tall trees,
They formed an institution called “The Lower South West Football League.”
The stock are hard and tough and wiry, the types that never say die,
From stockmen, cauli growers, tree pluckers, spud growers, timbermen, with an odd Greenie thrown in just to have a try.
It is the mill town boys again, Southerners from Pembi, Northcliffe and Quinninup and Deanmill,
From Manji, the Mill and Dingup who will fight this battle royal till they die.
Then there will be the umpires, their eyes dull, their heads flat, with absolutely no brains at all, all trying to ruin the game.
The boys from the tall timber country will make the AFL look tame.
It will be hard and rough and bloody as the struggle ebbs and flows,
The result of the battle still no-one knows.
And all the cracks will gather for the fray,
The oldies from Pembi, there will be Cooda, Foxy, Dan, Luz, Stoich, Ginge and Johnno and maybe Flick and Johnny T. too.
From the Mill there will be Harv, Boomer, Massey, Spiro, Peo, and maybe Cooky and Tutty too, hoping to see the game through.
But when all the dust has settled and the siren sound long gone,
It will be Giaco, Gibbo and the East and Moloney boys fighting for the glory,
Or Della, Gilly, Cozzi, the Ditas and all the Ohs who will be victorious.
And when all the dust has settled and all the supporters gone home,
The Deanmill and the Southerners boys will crack a can or two and reflect upon the game.

I wish brothers Danny and Peter Lunardi all the best for the game on Sunday. I think it will be a great event.

Subject: Lower South West Football Grand Final [Legislative Assembly - Statement]

Date: 20 September 2001

Hansard reference: p. 4126 [online (pdf)]

You've heard it before, but it's still amusing

2006-11-30T17:20:00.000+08:00

HON SIMON O’BRIEN (South Metropolitan) [11.05 am]: [...] It is argued that this new law will keep people out of the criminal justice system. Yet, the Opposition has already demonstrated in this place and elsewhere that the model for this policy has produced the opposite result in its home jurisdiction of South Australia. No matter how much minor tweaking one does around the edges of that model, it is an egg that cannot be repaired. The Gallop Labor Government continues to be in denial over these matters. Persistence in certain circumstances can be an admirable quality; however, obstinate persistence in the face of overwhelming evidence of folly is not. The following exchange took place off Newfoundland in the North Atlantic in October 1995 between Canadian authorities and the United States Navy. It commenced with the Canadians sending the following signal by radio -

Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the north.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert your course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert your course.

Americans: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic Fleet. We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that you change your course 15 degrees North. I say again, that’s one five degrees North, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

Canadians: We are a lighthouse. Your call.

The Gallop Labor Government is in charge of the ship of state, and it is heading for the electoral rocks on this matter. It is blind to the warnings of experience. It is deaf to the entreaties of reason. Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich, as the parliamentary secretary representing the minister who has responsibility for this Bill, has tried to interject, and I have ignored her, but I -

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: There is no way that we can be heading for the electoral rocks with you in opposition!

The PRESIDENT: Order! I commend the actions of the member who has the call in ignoring unruly interjections.

Subject: Cannabis Control Bill 2003 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 14 May 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 7606b - 7622a [online (pdf)]

You know they're getting computer savvy when...

2006-11-30T07:56:00.000+08:00

Hon SIMON O’BRIEN: Let us go straight to the serious matter of this bill. There is an age-old question of whether the word in the title should be “preventive” or “preventative”. The minister is just bursting to explain why we have gone for the over-the-top, extra-syllabic “preventative” rather than “preventive”, and I look forward to him telling us why, as the committee report asked about it.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: Do they mean the same?

Hon SIMON O’BRIEN: According to the Oxford English Dictionary, it is “preventive”, but Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich should check it on Google.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: No, I’ll leave that with you!

Hon SIMON O’BRIEN: There is never a 12-year-old kid around when one needs one!

The DEPUTY CHAIRMAN: Does the member not know how to google?

Hon SIMON O’BRIEN: I might google but only when it is near the time!

Subject: Terrorism (Preventative Detention) Bill 2005 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 22 August 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 4880c - 4899a [online (pdf)]

Stumping chance

2006-11-29T16:50:00.000+08:00

MR B.K. MASTERS (Vasse) [4.33 pm]: [...] It is my view that the Premier is Western Australia’s equivalent of Shane Warne. Shane Warne is very clever at spin, bearing in mind his 491 test wickets - he will probably take a lot more - but what is happening when neither Shane Warne nor the Premier are on the field? When we look at what they are doing when they are not spinning, so to speak, I think we will understand that both the Premier and Shane Warne are doing things with their messages - in Shane Warne’s case by SMS messages on the phone and in the Premier’s case in a whole range of other ways - that are less than honourable. For example, the Premier in so many of his activities blames everyone but his own Government for the Government’s inability to solve problems and to deal with the important issues of the State. Instead, the Government and the Premier go off and spin into all sorts of different, irrelevant and largely illusory issues.

I do not want to talk in any detail about Shane Warne’s apparent lack of -

Dr G.I. Gallop: I was a leg spin bowler, and I can bowl a wrong’un too.

Mr B.K. MASTERS: “You’re a better man than I am, Gunga Din!” - at least on the cricket field!

I do not wish to comment on Shane Warne’s apparent long-term commitment to his wife, but I note that the Premier in this case should in theory be married to both the union movement and to WA’s working class. However, the Premier and the Australian Labor Party - this Government - are now wedded to anyone who will deliver them green votes and to anyone who is associated with the antidevelopment chardonnay-sipping socialist set. They have left their roots behind. I could make some puns about that, but I will not. Unfortunately I have to accuse the Premier of being WA’s equivalent of Shane Warne.

Mr P.B. Watson: A winner!

Mr B.K. MASTERS: The member for Albany should think about what he is saying. Like the famous cricketer, the Premier’s spin is now being shown for what it really is - a distraction from his real job, which is to govern Western Australia for the betterment of all Western Australians. Unfortunately, on this issue of Ningaloo and Mauds Landing the Premier is spinning, spinning, spinning on a -

Mr R.N. Sweetman interjected.

Mr B.K. MASTERS: Maybe a stump, but he is on a very sticky wicket. I am pleased to say that finally the media is starting to understand the rules by which he plays his game.

Subject: Ningaloo Reef Coastline [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 13 August 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 9895b - 9918a [online (pdf)]

Greenough said...

2006-11-29T08:50:00.000+08:00

66. Mr G.A. WOODHAMS to the minister representing the Minister for Education and Training:

Before I ask this question I acknowledge the presence in the public gallery of some of the constituents from the seat of Merredin. I welcome them to the house.

I refer to a media statement of 11 April 2003 in which the previous Minister for Education and Training, Hon Alan Carpenter, promised to “revolutionise remote learning” by installing specialised telecommunication systems in the homes of all children studying through the School of the Air and Schools of Isolated and Distance Education at no cost to families.

[... asks six part question ...]

The SPEAKER: Order! I think most people in this place would consider that question far too long. If the member for Greenough wants detailed answers to questions such as those, he might like to consider putting his questions on notice. I presume notice of the question has been given.

Mr A.J. CARPENTER replied:

Some notice has been given of the question. It is an absolute delight for me to be asked a question by the member for Greenough. Is it the new member for Greenough’s first question in Parliament? I will not bore the house, but I find it interesting. We go back a long way. He was my school captain when I started my first year in high school at Albany High School. An explanation attached to this question is building! He and I have known each other for years; we worked together at the ABC and Channel 7 when it was called TVW 7 - a magnificent place to work in those days. More importantly, we were members of a very inclusive band of supporters of Subiaco Football Club who went to every home and away game. When we were contemplating what were the silliest things to yell out, he rose to the occasion with a cry that has not been surpassed and yelled out - he might want to finish this - “Oobie, doobie” -

Mr G.A. Woodhams: Come on Subi!

Several members interjected.

Mr A.J. CARPENTER: No catchcry has ever taken root like that. It echoes around the grounds of the WAFL today, even though no-one is there to yell it out! The players are waiting for it! Where is it? It was absolutely magnificent.

I asked the member for Greenough to please ask me a question. Consistent with his character, he has asked six questions, none of which I can answer, even though, to be fair, he gave notice at 12.10 pm today! I am no longer the Minister for Education and Training, and I know that is regretted by 25 000-odd state school teachers; they lie awake at night wishing I was back, just as I wish for the echoes of “Oobie, doobie”!

Subject: Home-Based Remote Students [Legislative Assembly - Questions Without Notice]

Date: 7 April 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 551b - 551b [online (pdf)]

No tackle, however

2006-11-28T18:38:00.001+08:00

MR McGOWAN (Rockingham) [9.32 pm]: I will be handling this Bill on behalf of the Government because the Minister for Agriculture, Forestry and Fisheries is a member of the other place and his representative in this Chamber, his parliamentary secretary, the member for Cockburn, is absent and will not be able to deal with it.

Mr Carpenter: There is something fishy about that.

Mr McGOWAN: That could be true. Maybe he is the one that got away.

Mr Carpenter: Just as long as you do not attempt to gut the Bill; I am only baiting the member and he has taken it hook, line and sinker.

Mr McGOWAN: There is no doubt about that -

Mr Carpenter: What I am afraid of is that he is completely out of his depth.

Mr McGOWAN: There is no doubt that the Minister for Education is all washed up.

Mr Carpenter: What we need here is protection against the sharks in this region, so I hope that that is included in the Bill.

The DEPUTY SPEAKER: The member for Rockingham might like to address the second reading.

Mr Carpenter: He is having a whale of a time.

Mr McGOWAN: I am looking forward to getting on with the Bill. It is very interesting and listening to the Minister for Education -

Mr Carpenter: He might be looking forward to it, but he is behaving like a stunned mullet.

Mr McGOWAN: The Minister for Education is behaving like an old fishwife in his remarks about this Bill.

Subject: Fish Resources Management Amendment Bill 2001 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 12 December 2001

Hansard reference: p. 7048 [online (pdf)]

I'm guessing you didn't like "budget pie".

2006-11-28T18:38:00.000+08:00

Mr F.M. LOGAN: I suggest the member for Greenough shut up; he is a boofhead.

Mr G. Woodhams: Thank you for being polite, member.

Mr F.M. LOGAN: He should just shut up; he is not making sense at all.

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (No. 2) 2006 [Legislative Assembly - Standing Orders - Suspension]

Date: 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a [online (pdf)]

< insert sound fx here >

2006-11-28T18:06:00.000+08:00

Hon PAUL LLEWELLYN: [...] Without exception the debate on the voting system occurred as a line item. I am not drawing too much of a conclusion; I am merely saying that that was the line of inquiry that I undertook. The Greens wrote to the councils that had written to us. We were transparent about the fact that on principle we support proportional preferential voting. However, we told them that we are interested to hear their substantial arguments. When the Standing Committee on Environment and Public Affairs investigates the bill, the various proponents will be able to outline their issues and concerns. Was that the Leader of the House? I hope that Hansard caught that yawn. It was a very deep yawn. I wonder how that will be reflected in Hansard.

Hon Peter Collier: He’s as subtle as a flamethrower!

Hon PAUL LLEWELLYN: I am sorry to have bored the Leader of the House so much! Nevertheless, I will continue with my comments.

Subject: Local Government Amendment Bill 2006 [Legislative Council - Motion (Instruction to Committee of the Whole)]

Date: 23 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8727c - 8743a [online (pdf)]

After the First Test, England might need the Liberal approach...

2006-11-28T11:14:00.000+08:00

493. Mr P.B. WATSON to the Minister for Local Government and Regional Development:

Can the minister tell the house whether the sale of Telstra will offer any security of services for Western Australia?

Mr J.J.M. BOWLER replied:

I thank the member for Albany for the question and point out that he looks a bit bleary-eyed. He must have stayed up late last night watching that fantastic contest in which the king of spin bowled his balls down the wicket, with little leg breaks and sliders, and the occasional top spinner, only to be thwarted by one batsman. Members may think I am talking about Shane Warne and Kevin Pietersen, but no, I am talking about the great king of spin in Australia, John Howard, and the one person who will stand up to him, Barnaby Joyce. Barnaby just hits John Howard back over his head. While the rest of the Liberal Party seems to be bamboozled by the king of spin’s little leggies, Barnaby plays them as they are back over his head - another six, Barnaby! While the Liberal Party in Western Australia is playing like Colin Cowdrey and Geoff Boycott, just poking out the pad, occupying the benches and doing nothing, there is Barnaby, just showing them what they can do. I had given up hope for the other side, but all of a sudden over the weekend the former wonder king, Hon Norman Moore, that great batsman from the past - he is past his peak now and probably will not get back into the first XI - suddenly found a bit of form. Suddenly Hon Norman Moore started hitting John Howard; he started saying that he could read his spin and he was going to start hitting the ball for Western Australia. I just hope that the Liberal senators - Judith Adams; Ian Campbell -

A government member interjected.

Mr J.J.M. BOWLER: Exactly - who are they? - Alan Eggleston; Chris Ellison; David Johnston, a former mate of mine from Kalgoorlie; and Ross Lightfoot - will take a leaf out of the batting efforts of Barnaby Joyce and not the Colin Cowdreys on the opposition benches here. They are just occupying the benches. They have not scored a run for a long time. I hope those senators will start doing what they are supposed to do and go in to bat for Western Australia.

Subject: Telstra Sale, Security of Telecommunications Services [Legislative Assembly - Questions Without Notice]

Date: 13 September 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 5157b - 5157b [online (pdf)]

Actually it's quite desirable for potential developers

2006-11-25T12:35:00.000+08:00

Hon ANTHONY FELS: [...] Submissions about those issues ought to be made, considered and addressed before we have daylight saving for three years, and possibly beyond. Referring this bill to the Standing Committee on Legislation will give us that opportunity.

[...]

The committee must also consider the impact that daylight saving will have on migration to Western Australia. [...] One argument that has been presented in favour of daylight saving is that WA now has hundreds of thousands of new Western Australians who were not here 15 years ago. Those people have come from places such as England, which has daylight saving. The committee can determine whether those emigrants would have come to Western Australia if we had daylight saving. It may also consider what other groups of people we might be able to attract to WA. Western Australia is enjoying an unprecedented boom economically; indeed, property values are rising despite the fact that we do not have daylight saving.

Several members interjected.

The PRESIDENT: Order, members! There are too many interjections. Hon Anthony Fels has been given direction about what he can and cannot say. He has been keeping within those reasonable bounds; however, when he has strayed, I have had cause to pull him up. I do not need members to interject and thus prolong the debate unnecessarily.

Hon ANTHONY FELS: Another issue that must be considered is Western Australia’s location in relation to cities in the eastern states. [...] Many cities in the world have daylight saving. Perhaps it is worth looking beyond the convenience of being able to ring someone in Sydney or Melbourne an hour earlier. A committee will be able to consider how daylight saving will impact on our communications with other cities in the world. I note that Baghdad has daylight saving. However, that does not necessarily make Baghdad a great place to live.

Hon Kate Doust interjected.

Hon ANTHONY FELS: Perhaps Hon Kate Doust should be on the committee.

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill (no. 2) 2006 [Legislative Council (second reading)]

Date: 16 November 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 8335b - 8376a [online (pdf)]

Effervescent, or, more than Greenough?

2006-11-25T11:30:00.000+08:00

Ms J.A. RADISICH: [...] It is my opinion that fizzy drinks do not have a place in schools. I am sure some people will disagree with me. Some schools have said that their canteens need to sell junk food and fizzy drinks to make money. It is not an acceptable argument. I put it to the government that if it is the case that this issue is about providing funding to schools rather than what kids are eating, it becomes a separate issue that needs consideration.

Mr A.D. McRae: What sort of fizzy drinks are you talking about?

Ms J.A. RADISICH: I thank the member for Riverton for asking.

Ms K. Hodson-Thomas: Did you prompt him?

Ms J.A. RADISICH: No, I did not. However, he did well.

I looked at the nutritional content, or lack thereof, of some fizzy drinks that currently are available in some schools. It is cause for great alarm, which I will demonstrate. For example, Coca-Cola and Sprite are common drinks that are available to children at some schools, drinks that I am sure many members have ingested on occasion. Members know that Sprite and Coke have a high sugar content. It is something in the order of 16 teaspoons of sugar in just one can of drink. Professor Dingle from Murdoch University has stated that if we stopped drinking two cans of these drinks per day, we would all lose half a kilo per month.

Mr G. Woodhams: I will disappear!

Ms J.A. RADISICH: The member for Greenough needs to keep drinking them, but the rest of us could probably cut back.

Subject: Appropriation (Consolidated Fund) Bill (no. 1) 2006 [Legislative Assembly Second Reading - Cognate Debate]

Date: 17 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 2794b - 2848a [online (pdf)]

Ashes to ashes

2006-11-25T09:10:00.000+08:00

Hon PETER FOSS: [...] The House sent this Bill to the Standing Committee on Legislation to make what looked to be an unworkable supplementary notice paper into a workable one. Had the House tried to operate under normal circumstances, it would have been totally perplexed -

Hon Simon O’Brien: Can the minister get that ringing phone for me?

Hon Tom Stephens: My apologies, Mr Deputy Chairman. I think it’s my wife.

The DEPUTY CHAIRMAN (Hon Barry House): Standing Orders are very clear on this issue.

Hon PETER FOSS: I do not know whether that constitutes an interjection, but I am sure it is unruly.

Hon Simon O’Brien: If it is a message from Warnie, I want it tabled.

Subject: Environmental Protection Amendment Bill 2002 [Legislative Council - Committee]

Date: 21 August 2003

Hansard reference: pp. 10329b - 10360a [online (pdf)]

Greenough is Greenough

2006-11-22T20:13:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, the daylight saving bill was finally accepted by the Legislative Assembly. In memoriam of a sane time zone, I thought I'd share another one of the member for Greenough's brilliant compositions:

Mr G. WOODHAMS: [...] During my browsing in the National Gallery of Australia and the National Library, I came across, not unexpectedly, a poem dedicated to daylight saving. It was written by that well-known poet or poetess - not Dorothea Mackellar. The poem is called I Love A Sunburn Daily -

The love of beaches and stubbies
Of chardonnays by the pool
And doing deals in Sydney
With Coles and Woolies too
Strong love of wearing raybans
While driving in your Govvie car
I know but cannot share it
Because this time you’ve gone too far

See I love a sunburn daily
An extra hour will not work
The last time we were asked to try it
We were still recovering from Premier Burke
I love my faded curtains
And cows producing latte
My clock on Western Standard Time
And more bloody hours at Bunnings on Sunday

The tragic Labor government
And those swingers Matt and Johnny D
Long lunches with revenge intent
Giving Eric an extra hour to spend our surplus. Free.
Let the Greens tangle in the upper house
Where the Ljiljannas coil,
And trendies deck the lounges
After a hard day’s toil

Core of my heart, my rolex
Her ticking body so sweet
Mum and Dad rolling around in the morning
There’s a scene hard to beat

Mrs D.J. Guise: That’s too much information!

Mr G. WOODHAMS: Members will read into this bill what they want to read into it; that is what I have been hearing throughout the debate! The poem further reads -

But then the clockheads gather
And we can bless again
The dopey daylight savers
Who haven’t got a brain

Core of my heart, my cheap imitation bought in Thailand Rolex
In this land that time forgot
An extra hour every day,
And Carpy wants the lot.
We now have one fat time zone
All lined up with the Congo
Even the Mandurah line can run on time
With Alannah the Station Master keeping time on the bongo

The filmy veil of woopy weed
That thickens in the air
Pot smokers another hour to burn and indulge in vacant stare.
A summer of endless daytime
No clock to hold her back
This wilful, lavish land sucking mid strength
Can’t catch a taxi, mate they’re enjoying the sunset at Cottesloe
And the flag fall will set you back.

Mr Acting Speaker, this is the last, I think very important, verse of one of Dorothea’s lost poems -

All you who have not loved her,
Daylight savers You don’t understand -
Though sunburn holds many splendours,
And of it when I die,
I know to what Time Zone
My homing thoughts will fly.

Mr Acting Speaker, I am in an emphatic mode; maybe you did not gather that. Maybe some of the soft-headed modernists, as I refer to them, on either side of the house do not understand it, either.

There was a forum in ancient Rome, during the Roman Empire, known as the senate, in which there were several Caesars. Members may know about the senate and about Caligula, who appointed his horse as his successor emperor.

Mr R.C. Kucera: A bit like the leadership of the Liberal Party!

Mr G. WOODHAMS: The member may be correct, and I will not dispute him on that note.

Subject: DAYLIGHT SAVING BILL (NO 2) 2006 (WA Legislative Assembly)

Date: Tuesday, 31 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7886b - 7952a (online (PDF))

Not the best of weeks

2006-11-20T16:30:00.000+08:00

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: [...] We must go through a raft of minor provisions in the bill. I wanted to speak only on public funding. I understand why some members of the public are opposed to it and I can understand why some members in the house will vote against it. I agree that it will be abused and that the ALP will be the biggest benefactor out of this process.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Then join us, brother.

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: On the other hand, I want to maintain a strong and healthy democracy in Western Australia. The traditional funding that has flowed to political parties in the past has been drying up. There is no guarantee that union funds will continue to flow to the ALP as they have done in the past. They might also dry up in the future. There has been a change in the public’s attitude about the funding of the political process. There has been a significant drop in the standing of parliamentarians among the community. These types of bills and debates contribute to the perception of members of Parliament. I am in favour of public funding as matter of principle. If members will nail me down -

Ms S.E. Walker: I am not going to marry you.

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: I am very disappointed! Is our engagement officially off? It is a bad week when the Dockers and Eagles lose and my engagement is called off!

Mr R.F. Johnson: Which is the biggest disappointment?

Mr M.W. TRENORDEN: Definitely the engagement! I was looking forward to losing my pension!

Mr B.S. Wyatt: Can I have some of yours?

Subject: Electoral Legislation Amendment Bill 2006

Date: 13 September 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 5881c - 5893a [online (pdf)]

Stop.

2006-11-19T09:20:00.000+08:00

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: [...] I will run through this chart. It summarises the whole daylight saving issue. The bottom of the graph shows the hours of zero to 24, which is normal Western Australian standard time. The hours at the top are daylight saving time, with the one-hour difference. It shows the business times in the eastern states, and the overlap with Western Australia. It shows the enormous benefits that daylight saving will have for business. That might seem small, but it is a huge factor.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Who prepared that graph?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: Dr Hammer.

The green lines show sunrise and sunset. The blue line shows the evening meal time. The recreation time is highlighted here. The evening recreation time is shown as being half during sunlight hours and half not during sunlight hours. This is what it will be under daylight saving. The white part on the graph shows the time that is allowed for people to get home after work. The significant thing from my point of view - this is something that all members should look at - is the meal and recreation time. I call that family time.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Do we all have to eat at that time?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I would be happy to swap the blue and the orange lines for the member for Hillarys, because he is unusual! They are interchangeable. That shows how daylight saving will have the biggest benefit in giving families time to recreate together and engage in the activities that they enjoy.

There has been an interesting argument that daylight saving will result in a huge difference in temperatures. The graph shows the temperature rise, and also the temperature fall when the sea breeze comes in.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Is that every day? I find that astounding!

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I am glad, member for Hillarys! I hope that at the end of this debate the member for Hillarys will be supporting daylight saving! The difference in temperatures because of the one-hour time difference will be between half a degree and one and a half degrees. It is not significant. The argument has been put that there will be a huge increase in temperatures, and school kids will die in the heat of the school bus. The reality is that the maximum increase in temperatures will be between half a degree and one and a half degrees. It will make very little difference. That is real data, not imaginary data.

Mr T.K. Waldron interjected.

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I am not going to win the argument with the members of the National Party.

Mr R.F. Johnson: You have convinced me, my friend! That graph is absolutely astounding!

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I like the member for Hillarys’ humour! I am very serious about the fact that daylight saving will be of enormous benefit for business. More importantly, it is about lifestyle and families, and about tackling the health issue in our community.

Mr C.J. Barnett: I think we need a photo of you holding up that graph!

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: I am sure I will have many to give the member!

Mr D.T. Redman: Is it correct that the hottest time of the day is actually four o’clock?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: On the day shown on this graph, the temperature peaked at four o’clock. It will peak at five o’clock during daylight saving hours. As I have said, the difference in temperatures because of the one-hour time difference will be between half a degree and one and a half degrees.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Do you give a guarantee with that?

Mr J.B. D’ORAZIO: The member for Mindarie has given an unequivocal guarantee that if anyone’s curtains fade because of the introduction of daylight saving, he will replace them.

Mr R.F. Johnson: I have a pair of curtains at home that have faded!

Subject: Daylight Saving Bill 2006 (Legislative Assembly, second reading)

Date: 25 October 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 7648b - 7652a [online (pdf)]

A bit too excited about the budget

2006-11-18T19:03:00.000+08:00

Mr T.R. BUSWELL: I think something has happened to me since I became a member, because when I go to bed I now read such things as this consolidated financial statement. I ask that the Treasurer put his photograph on the inside of the cover as a memento.

An opposition member: Something for you to read before you go to sleep.

Mr T.R. BUSWELL: Perish the thought.

Mr E.S. Ripper: I do not like the idea of you looking at my photograph when you are in bed.

Mr T.R. BUSWELL: I may already be doing so! If I have seen a woman’s face in ink spots, I can see the Treasurer’s face on the flyleaf. Who knows what could be happening in my mind since I came into this place?

Mr R.C. Kucera: No wonder he has a blue hand!

Subject: APPROPRIATION (CONSOLIDATED FUND) BILL (NO 3) 2005 (WA Legislative Assembly, second reading)

Date: Thursday, 24 November 2005

Hansard reference: pp. 7730b - 7743a [online (PDF)]

A brush with nature

2006-11-18T16:41:00.000+08:00

Mr B.K. Masters: In the few minutes left available to me I will make a couple of comments. In some respects it is unfortunate that this debate is not taking place next week, because this Sunday I will lead about 30 people on a 15-kilometre walk through the proposed Yelverton state forest. Wearing my hat as the President of the Busselton Naturalists Club, this year in the cooler winter and spring months we will do 10 walks of between 15 and 20 kilometres through the proposed Yelverton, Bramley and Forest Grove National Parks.

Several members interjected

Mr B.K. Masters: The members are being rude; I can tell.

Mr B.J. Grylls: We didn’t know what you were president of.

Dr J.M. Edwards: Or what you would be wearing!

Mr B.K. Masters: I know what the members are suggesting. It is far too cold to do what they are suggesting that maybe I do!

Mr B.J. Grylls: It is called getting back to nature.

Mr B.K. Masters: The word is "naturalist" not "naturist".

Mr B.J. Grylls: We will check Hansard!

Mr B.K. Masters: Yes, I think it is important that the member do that.

Contributed by Dave

Subject: Reserves (National Parks, Conservation Parks and Nature Reserves) Bill 2004 [Legislative Assembly, second reading]

Date: 19 August 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 5305b - 5318

The world is not Greenough

2006-11-18T12:17:00.000+08:00

MR G. WOODHAMS (Greenough) [5.27 pm]: It gives me great pleasure to have the opportunity to reply to the Treasurer’s budget speech. This is perhaps an appropriate gathering, as there is an intimate number of people in the chamber, and it is a suitable venue to provide some inspiration and thought, and perhaps also some provocation.

Mr R.F. Johnson: I disagree!

Mr G. WOODHAMS: I will pay the member for Hillarys afterwards! With all due respect to Don McLean and his epic song American Pie, I present to members this evening an ode to the budget, “Budget Pie”-

A long, long time ago . . .
I can still remember
How the budget used to make me smile.

And I knew if I had my chance
That I could make the country dance
And, maybe, they’d be happy for awhile

But the Treasurer made me shiver
With that sad paper he did deliver.
Mandurah rail was the headline
Putting more people on the breadline.

I can’t remember if I cried
When I saw the Treasurer talk about this ride
But something touched me deep inside
The day the budget died.

So bye-bye, divide up the pie.
Drove my Hyundai to service station
But the cost was too high.
And them good old Labor boys were ridin’ nigh
Singin’, “Mandurah rail or I die.
“Mandurah rail or I die.”

Did you write the rail dept off?
And do you have faith in Kym above,
If the Budget tells you so?

Do you believe in standard gauge,
Can ticket inspectors save your mortal soul,
And can you teach me how to tunnel real slow?

Well, I know that you’re insane
’cause I saw you sittin’ on the train.
You both had come from caucus
A ripper of a budget had made you raucus.

I was a lovely middle age Nats’ buck
Wearing my houndstooth jacket driving a pickup truck,
But I knew I was out of luck,
The day the budget was . . . deep fried.

So, bye-bye, divide up the pie.”
Drove my school bus to the primary,
But it was closed for all times.
Them Labor boys were drinkin’ Chablis Dry
And singin’, Mandurah Rail or I die.
Mandurah Rail or I die.”

Now for six years they’ve spending the large
Throwing money on the city like there was no charge,
But that’s not how it used to be.
When real electorates were provided for all
Not one vote one value tricking the soul
But a vote that came from you and me,

But while the people were looking down,
The budget stole every small town.
Parliament was adjourned;
No money was returned.

And the Premier spoke to the Legislative Clerk
Jim, John, and Eric practiced in the park,
And western Power left us in the dark
The day the budget died.

We were singing,
“bye-bye, budget pie.”
Caught the ambulance to the hospital
But no beds could I spy.
Them Labor girls were demanding portfolios from guys
And singin’, “Mandurah Rail or I die.
Mandurah Rail and I die.”

Helter skelter in a spending swelter.
The Ministers flew off to the Mandurah shelter,
Thirty miles long and failing fast.

The budget landed foul as it was cast
The back bench tried for a forward pass,
But their voices were muffled, the votes already past.

Now the budget speech was sad, obscene
While the front bench played with a train set keen
We all got up to speak,
The situation was bleak!
’cause the house battled to hold a quorum
The big 2 billion spend on boredom
Clickety Clack Clickety Clack Clickety Clack
Do you recall what was revealed
The day the budget died?

We started singing,
“bye-bye, divide up the pie.”
I’m riding my horse to the levee,
But the Yarragadee was dry.

The Labor were saving for tickets to buy
And singin’, Mandurah Rail or I die.
Mandurah Rail or I die.”

There they were . . . all in one place,
Generation Labor lost in space
With no time left to start again.
So come on: jackhammer be nimble, jackhammer be quick!
Jackhammer under the causeway and be damn quick
Cause surplus is the Ministers only friend.

And as I watched her on the toil
Justifying blowouts like a kettle will boil
No angel born in hell
Could break that Ministers spell.
And as the figures climbed high into the night
To light the railway station light,
I saw the Premier laughing with delight
The day the budget died

He was singing,
“bye-bye, budget pie.”
Drove my govvy car to the footy
But the Dockers made me cry.

The back room deals caught me on the fly
singin’, “Mandurah Rail or I die.
“Mandurah Rail or I die.”

I met a member who sang the blues
And I asked her for some happy news,
But she just said return or one way
I went down to the sacred floor
Where I’d heard the budget years before,
But the man there said the Treasurer wouldn’t pay.

And in the streets: the children screamed,
Nothing for them and the places they dreamed.
But not a word was spoken;
The spirit of the future broken.
And the three men I admire most:
The father, son, and the holy ghost,
Couldn’t catch the train to the coast
Still not finished, another blowout at the Minister’s roast.

And they were singing,
“bye-bye, divide up the pie.”
Drove my solar powered yacht to the Swan,
As a salt slug went by.
Under the river the tunnel workers were dry.
Singin’, “Mandurah Rail or I die.
Mandurah Rail or I die.”

They were singing,
“bye-bye, we’ve eaten the pie.”
Drove the train to the station,
As the Labor Party went by
Their near sited leaders were drinking diet coke - you want fries with that? - with a sigh
Singin’ their new mantra, “Mandurah Rail or I die.”
Mandurah Rail or I die.

Several members interjected.

Mr G. WOODHAMS: That was a one-off performance. Many members will appreciate that it will not be repeated.

[...]

Mr G. WOODHAMS: [...] I seek leave for an extension of time.

[Member’s time extended.].

Mr R.F. Johnson: Only if you tell us the poem again!

Mr G. WOODHAMS: A long, long time ago - I can still remember it! It is only a monotone, which matches my “monoceps”. That is the way I am cast.

Subject: Appropriation (Consolidated Fund) Bill (no. 1) 2006 [Legislative Assembly, second reading, cognate debate]

Date: 17 May 2006

Hansard reference: pp. 2794b - 2848a [online (pdf)]

Old hoons

2006-11-17T14:23:00.000+08:00

HON DERRICK TOMLINSON (East Metropolitan) [7.47 pm]: [...] Every time I drive down Onslow Road these days I find myself driving at 44 kilometres an hour.

Hon Graham Giffard: It happens when you get old.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: No, it does not happen when people get old; it happens when good behaviour is positively reinforced.

Hon Graham Giffard: My mother does 44 kilometres an hour everywhere.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: If I were the member’s mother I would be very cautious too, because look what happened once when she was not paying attention

[...]

HON DERRICK TOMLINSON (East Metropolitan) [7.47 pm]: [...] I have heard reference to hoons and burnouts. I think I know what a burnout is. I have seen young people do burnouts. I am not quite sure what a hoon is. I went to the Oxford English Dictionary, and the nearest definition I could get to “hoon” was “hooligan”. A “hooligan” is the name given to Irishmen of south London who were associated with ruffian groups. I do not know whether “hoon” is an abbreviation of “hooligan”, but there is no reference to hoons in the dictionary. I understand that these hoons do burnouts in particular places in Perth, such as the car park at Scarborough Beach. I understand also that these hoons do drag-racing along Leach Highway and in Rockingham.

Hon Jim Scott: I think a hoon is a hooligan at speed.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: I see. I do not know who they are. All I know is that I can recall as a 16 or 17-year-old fellow meeting a group of my peers every Friday night at the Bright Spot at Sandringham Hill. They were not called hoons. They were called the boys. The boys used to meet at the Bright Spot, and they all drove hotted-up 1936 Ford V8s -

Hon Peter Foss: Great stuff!

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: They were. I saw one being driven on the road ahead of me just the other day. It was an absolutely beautiful vehicle - a hotted-up 1936 Ford V8. The boys would stand around getting high on hamburgers. They were real hamburgers in those days - not Kentucky Fried hamburgers, but real hamburgers. [...] We are told that these hoons are driving these $50 000 vehicles and are doing burnouts in the car park at Scarborough Beach, and are racing along Leach Highway at three o’clock in the morning and are a danger to everyone else on the road. Anyone who is on the road at three o’clock in the morning would need to explain why he or she is there. As for people in the car park at Scarborough Beach, I do not know that that represents a threat to life and limb on the road. These hoons are doing exactly what the boys of my acquaintance were doing.

Subject: ROAD TRAFFIC AMENDMENT (IMPOUNDING AND CONFISCATION OF VEHICLES) BILL 2004 (WA Legislative Council, second reading)

Date: Tuesday, 1 June 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 3064d — 3076a [online (PDF)]

The village idiot

2006-11-17T12:44:00.000+08:00

Ms S.E. WALKER (Nedlands): That was why I was concerned about JPs. I endorse what other members have said about JPs; they do a great job. However, they do not have any regular or mandatory ongoing training.

Mr J.A. McGinty: But this legislation will require them to do the initial training course.

Ms S.E. WALKER: Yes, but they could do that training course and then not know anything about, for instance, the laws that the Attorney General introduced that relate to the Sentencing Act. [...] Has anyone, in looking at this package, done any research into whether this could act unfairly on people in the community when they are sentenced? For instance, does the Attorney General have any statistics on how many people have been sentenced by justices of the peace in Western Australia, and for what and how long?

Mr J.A. McGINTY: I do not have those statistics with me. There is no change in terms of the eligibility criteria proposed in this Bill. One might make the same comments about members of Parliament. We could ask what is the requirement to be a member of Parliament. The only requirement is that a person be elected. That does not mean that that person has any knowledge, ability, skill or capacity. A person could be the village idiot and be a member of Parliament. Perhaps some are.

Ms S.E. Walker: Some are. I am looking to my left.

Subject: Justices of the Peace Bill 2003

Date: 1 April 2004

Hansard reference: pp. 1536c - 1558a [online (pdf)]

Broome People

2006-11-17T10:51:00.000+08:00

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS (Carine): To return to the issue of the camel operators and the beautiful camels -

Mr R.F. Johnson (Hillarys): I would not say “beautiful”.

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: I think camels are very interesting animals.

Mr T. Buswell (Vasse - Deputy Leader of the Opposition): It depends whether you’re at the front or the back of the queue!

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: For the person sitting on the back, they are very interesting animals.

Mr G. Snook (Moore): They are an animal designed by a committee.

Subject: Cable Beach - Camel Tourism Operators

Date: 30 August 2006

Hansard reference: p. 5479 - 5495 [online]