Showing posts with label 2002. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2002. Show all posts

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Once upon a tie in the West


HON JOHN FISCHER (Mining and Pastoral) [5.55 pm]: I will make one or two precursory remarks before I thank some people. Yesterday, the Minister for Racing and Gaming commented by way of interjection on the tie I was wearing.

Hon Nick Griffiths: You have really dished it up to me today!

Hon JOHN FISCHER: The minister certainly deserves to be complimented on the tie he is wearing today. I am sure that anyone from the racing industry would be extremely proud that the minister is wearing a tie that is extremely befitting of the position he holds. While I am talking about neckties, it would be remiss of me not to mention the ties worn by Hon Peter Foss on occasion, and certainly Hon Robin Chapple runs a very close second to him. I mention this today because my nine-year-old daughter presented me with a musical tie that is certainly fitting for this occasion. It brings out the Christmas feeling!

Hon Kim Chance: I think the honourable member’s tie is out of order!

Hon Ken Travers: I told them not to push your button!

Hon JOHN FISCHER: I think I have a flat battery already, but I am sure I will play it again at a later stage.


Subject: Adjournment of the House [Legislative Council - Special]

Date: 19 December 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 4538b - 4544a [online (pdf)]

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Slightly disturbing


Hon FRANK HOUGH: This is an attractive business and I am sure the Government has looked at this issue. To build a large corporation and to put up an investment such as this requires guarantees; a return is needed on the investment. These things are very important. I do not believe that we should have a fragmented industry of half a dozen small timber industries feeding off the forest. The member of the Greens (WA) who holds a building licence - I do not think she is any relation of Bob the Builder -

A government member interjected.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: The member does not watch television.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: That is about your level.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: I do not watch The Wiggles.

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT (Hon Jon Ford): Order, members!

Hon Ken Travers: Can we fix it; yes we can!

The DEPUTY PRESIDENT: Order, members! Do not get excited at the end of the night.

Hon FRANK HOUGH: Thank you, Mr Deputy President. We will probably hit ’em high, hit ’em low and hit ’em with the old Pea Beu!


Subject: Wood Processing (Wesbeam) Agreement Bill 2002 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 25 September 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 1543b - 1553a [online (pdf)]

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Not on the Orange Stage...


MR RIPPER (Belmont - Treasurer) [9.39 am]: I thank the member for raising this issue. Members are not likely to find me at the Big Day Out concert, but it is an event that my sons have been to on occasions and I would be very disappointed on their behalf if the Big Day Out was affected by this insurance issue.

Mr Birney: You would make a good bouncer there.

Mr RIPPER: Does the member for Kalgoorlie think I would be okay in the mosh pit? My sons would advise him otherwise. The issue raised by the member for Rockingham -

Mr McGowan: They do not play Perry Como there.

Mr RIPPER: Is it possible to be in a mosh pit with Perry Como?


Subject: Crowd Control Insurance [Legislative Assembly - Grievance]

Date: 27 June 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 12252 [online (pdf)]

Saturday, February 03, 2007

It starts with love for foliage


MR HYDE (Perth) [5.57 pm]: [...] One of the most interesting issues to arise out of this debate was that raised by the opening speaker for the Opposition, the member for Greenough, in his important cultural heritage acknowledgment concerning the people of the western suburbs. He mentioned the cubbyhouses in the area and the activities that they have undertaken there. I draw members’ attention to the exceptionally rare bronzed Banksia menziesii. The name of this banksia gives some indication that it has blue-blood tendencies. It is the only one left in this area. As we all know, the red areas of Perth are slowly extending to the western suburbs. However, there is a bastion of blue-blooded Menzies-era hardwood left in this area. We need to find this bastion because I would be concerned if the Young Liberals in this Bushplan area were to put up the cubbyhouses that the member for Greenough referred to; I would be concerned if there is a Young Liberal’s cubbyhouse in this Banksia menziesii. There are no other known examples of this particular banksia between Kings Park and Bold Park. It is the Government’s priority to find out if there is a cubbyhouse in this area and what we will do about it. This is clearly one of the most important issues of this debate. The minister has already stated that the issues are underhand and completion will be forthcoming.

Sitting suspended from 6.00 to 7.00 pm

Mr HYDE: During the dinner break some other Labor members and I went out in search of this very important Banksia menziesii tree - the lone tree in the western suburbs containing a potential cubbyhouse used by the Young Liberals. We failed to find the tree, but you, Mr Acting Speaker (Mr Andrews), pointed out a Carnaby’s cockatoo on this important block of land. It is very rare, but it is on this site. Another of my colleagues on that search, the member for Albany, discovered a Gould’s goanna, and straightaway he said, “Look under there! That is a Varanus gouldii!” Another of my colleagues on that search, the member for Riverton, was a bit more adventurous. He went out on the left wing, and he said, “Hello! Under that eucalypt there is a collared sparrowhawk!” I was very impressed with my colleagues and their attachment to the flora and fauna. The coup de grĂ¢ce was when the member for Eyre, with his binoculars and, being a journalist like me, his old peaked cap to aid in vision at sunset, identified the white-cheeked honeyeater. I was impressed with the performance of my Labor colleagues on this environmental stretch of land.

[...]

Mr HYDE: [...]The member for Churchlands referred to the wonderful public meetings held in nearby Hackett Hall. I have spent many an evening on the stage at Hackett Hall in a variety of Thespian pursuits, as well as in the audience, and that area certainly has an odour issue. The minister alluded to her earlier days playing soccer. I can also inform the House that the member for Albany - that wonderful spotter of Varanus gouldii - trained on that same patch of turf, McGillivray Oval. We have established that he needed to take a big breath at a certain turn with a northerly wind, but we do not know whether taking that big breath then enhanced his lung capacity and enabled him to make the Olympic team, or whether it detracted him from winning two gold medals instead of almost one.

Mr McGowan: The problem was that he always stopped in the home straight to keep an eye out for birds!

Mr HYDE: That is a very good analogy.

[...]

MR EDWARDS (Greenough) [7.14 pm]: I hope the House will allow me a little levity. The member for Perth raised a few issues about Latin pronunciation. I commend him for that, and I hope he understands my Latin. I did not quite catch the name of -

Mr Hyde: Banksia menziesii.

Mr EDWARDS: Until the member for Perth brought it to my attention, I was not aware that there was such a plant. I respect his knowledge -

Mr Hyde: It is in the EPA report.

Mr EDWARDS: I understand that, and with levity I suggest that the member find a “hydeafloria”, which is slightly pink with red overtones. It is found in various parks of Perth. We would need a bird “hyde” to see a “hydeafloria”. That is my level of humour.


Subject: Underwood Avenue Bushland [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 27 March 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 9073 - 9075 [online (pdf): p. 9073 / 9074 / 9075]

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Intensive care


Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: England is the last place to go to get health service advice.

The minister managed to weasel his way onto an English breakfast television program similar to our Today show. The commentator told him to nick off because the English did not want him pinching their nurses. They have the same problem - a nurse shortage. I saw the program while I was in England recently. I got a hell of a surprise when our Minister for Health popped up.

Mr R.F. Johnson: Did he have make-up on?

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: Probably.

Mr J.N. Hyde: How many nurses did you see in the United Kingdom?

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: None; I had my wife with me.

Several members interjected.

Mr J.L. BRADSHAW: I am too old for that sort of thing.

Several members interjected.


Subject: Address-in-Reply [Legislative Assembly - Motion]

Date: 14 August 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 102z - 130z [online (pdf)]

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Derailed


Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: [...] I thank the Leader of the House for affording me the opportunity to make this speech on my return from parliamentary business. This issue has been of great interest to me over the past 14 months. I dream railcars and rail tracks.

Mr A.P. O’Gorman interjected.

Ms K. HODSON-THOMAS: No, I do not want a Thomas the Tank engine or the Fat Controller for Christmas.


Subject: Railway (Jandakot to Perth) Bill 2002 [Legislative Assembly - Second Reading]

Date: 17 September 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 1054b - 1069a [online (pdf)]

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Grim tales


HON DERRICK TOMLINSON (East Metropolitan) [3.02 pm]: I am not sure how to characterise this Bill. Bearing in mind that the second reading speech summarises the intent of the Bill, if one reads the minister’s second reading speech and loses sight of the Bill itself, it could be characterised as a “Mary Poppins Bill” - a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down in the most delightful way. If one is distracted by the eloquence of the second reading speech and does not pay attention to the contents of the Bill, it might be characterised as an “It will not hurt, did it Bill” because a person does not know what he is getting until after he has had it. It is only when the consequences are examined that the person knows what it is that he had. The third way of characterising this Bill -

The CHAIRMAN: Order, members!

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: I apologise to honourable members who are trying to carry on with their conversations. My voice does tend to intrude into their conversations but I shall try to reduce its timbre.

Hon Nick Griffiths: I can assure Hon Derrick Tomlinson that I was listening to his every word. I know that he, like I did, enjoyed the Mary Poppins movie many years ago and a spoonful of sugar does help the medicine go down. There is another long word I could use but I will not say it because I might get it wrong.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: The minister cannot help but listen to what I have to say because the whole world hears what I say. I want to make sure he absorbs what I have to say.

The third way of characterising this Bill is as the “Little Red Riding Hood Bill”.

Hon Nick Griffiths: And you are the big bad wolf.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: No, I am Little Red Riding Hood. Members know what happened to Little Red Riding Hood. On her way to Grandma’s house, with the express warning from her mother to beware of the wolf in the woods, poor Little Red Riding Hood was spied on by the wolf in the woods. Instead of the wolf jumping out and doing what wolves do to little maidens in the wood, he decided to go to Grandma’s house and disguise himself as someone else. He disguised himself as Grandma and decided to impose an intelligence test upon Little Red Riding Hood.

Hon Nick Griffiths: You are the big bad wolf.

Hon DERRICK TOMLINSON: No, I am Little Red Riding Hood. As we all know, the big bad wolf did something to Grandma - stuffed her into the cupboard or under the bed - and then dressed himself in her nightclothes and jumped into her bed. Totally oblivious to this, Little Red Riding Hood came into the house, saw Grandma in bed and said “Oh Grandma, what big eyes you have.” Grandma responded by saying “All the better to see you with, my dear.” Little Red Riding Hood failed the first test. She then said “Oh Grandma, what big ears you have.” Grandma responded “All the better to hear you with, my dear” and Little Red Riding Hood failed the second test. Can members imagine the situation; there is a wolf in the bed with more hair on his face than Hon Frank Hough or Hon Simon O’Brien and Little Red Riding Hood does not even twig that Grandma is a wolf; she must have been the original bimbo. Eventually Little Red Riding Hood said “Oh Grandma, what big teeth you have.” At that stage the wolf jumped out of bed, exposed himself, Little Red Riding Hood screamed, the woodman came in, dispatched the wolf and carried off Little Red Riding Hood. This Bill is a “Little Red Riding Hood Bill”.


Subject: Fire and Emergency Services Legislation Amendment Bill 2001 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 19 September 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 1253b - 1257a [online (pdf)]

Saturday, December 23, 2006

I'm trying to picture it...


Hon NORMAN MOORE: [...] They did not have the nerve - that is what it came down to - but I was prepared to do what had to be done in Western Australia. It demonstrated for all to see that the vast majority of students on every campus in Western Australia did not want to be a member of the guild and they did not join the guild.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich interjected.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: They did not join and they did not use the facilities either.

Hon Graham Giffard: Yes, they did.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: They used the facilities that were being run by the guild as commercial activities. They went to the tavern, for example, where 17-year-olds were taught how to drink.

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: Oh!

Hon NORMAN MOORE: Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich should not give me that nonsense. She should visit the tav one day and see what goes on there. She will get some idea of the wonderful things that are happening to people at the University of Western Australia!

Hon Ljiljanna Ravlich: I used to work in the tav.

Hon NORMAN MOORE: I hope she did not teach some of the young people the things that I know about.


Subject: Acts Amendment (Student Guilds and Associations) Bill 2002 [Legislative Council - Second Reading]

Date: 18 December 2002

Hansard reference: pp. 4468b - 4483a [online (pdf)]